Scope it, as in Horoscope: Go against the grain this holiday season. Be happy about them this year.
Bonehead Tip of the Day: When someone says “Happy Thanksgiving” make sure you tell them how hard the day is going to be, including the fact that you will not be celebrating. Tell them why, in detail, to make sure you instill the guilt and shame. In other words, please, leave it alone. We need days like this, whether you choose to partake or not. You could be thankful you do not have to travel or see relatives you would rather avoid.
Trivia: When Ben Franklin was told to fly a kite, he did, and did not take any notes on that experiment. Then he let the kite go and it got stuck in those pesky wires even though there were none around. The Pilgrims did not live in log cabins. There’s a very good chance they didn’t even know what they looked like. Log cabins, that is. For every human on earth, there are at least 1,500 pounds of termites. Most of mine are in my pants. What? Most of our tears discharge into the nose. For what it’s worth, the Mayflower weighed 180 tons but I have no idea how they weighed it.
The List: Top TV Shows.
Top TV shows.
1. “NFL Sunday Night Football” – 23.2 million viewers
2. “Dancing With the Stars” – 20.2 million
3. “NCIS” – 19.4 million
Notes: Like it or not, Bristol Palin helps “Dancing” ratings. Jennifer wins, but that will register in next week’s numbers. “AMAs” in at No. 17. Football crushes it in head-to-heads. NFL doing fantastic in the ratings across the board this year. Top show on cable as well this week. In fact, top two spots.
Closer: No kidding. A story we will hear every year at this time is the “How To” cook that darn turkey. I’ve got it down, thank you. I have never turned on my oven and still know how to do that, for crying out loud.