Choosing a new game that doesn’t suck is a sport in and of itself and can often be tricky as all heck. It’s hard to find an awesome game, but if you’re looking to purchase a total piece of crap, be sure to buy any of the five following game types.
The Me Too
If you ever find yourself liking a game because it reminds you of another game that you like, you – my friend – are about to make the critical mistake of buying a video game “me too” – often known as a video game rip-off. The easiest way to determine if you’re about to buy a video game knockoff is if you ever find yourself using the word “like” in order to describe said game. “Me Toos” are never like the game that they’re fashioned after and the worst part is that appearing like another game is the only thing most video game clones have going for themselves.
The Deadline Drop
When creating a video game, game developers have to meet deadlines, but oftentimes games are released regardless if they are finished by the final deadline or not. Deadline drops might be finished in the sense that you are able to play through the entire game, but they are often filled bugs and glitches and are lacking lots of features that would have been in-game if the developers had met their deadlines with the game. A great way to tell if you’re buying an unfinished or feature lacking game is if it’s a new release that’s under $60 – that’s a sure sign if you’ve never seen one.
A video game port is a game from a previous system that’s recoded to work on another system. Buying a game port can be tricky and it’s best not to assume that you’ll like a game on your current system because you enjoyed it on another gaming console. There are several factors that usually make video game ports suck beyond measure, including game controls, graphics, bugs, and in-built interface items that just don’t seem to work well with the new system as it did with the old.
The Franchise Crossover
Franchise crossover games are games built on other pop-culture successes – that hardly ever work out for the best as video games. Popular franchise crossovers are movie video games, TV show video games, and even retail company games like the infamous Burger King line of Xbox 360 games. Just about the only video game franchise crossover that has ever worked are the line of Lego games and any other crossover attempt should be avoided at all costs.
Party games are games that feature a large collection of simple minded and easily mastered games and are usually intended for occasions when your house is crowded with people that have never touched a video game controller before. If you want to dumb down your gaming skills to impress your non-gaming guests, party games are the way to go, but otherwise, these games totally suck and shouldn’t be purchased for single player use.
For more, read Why Gaming Box Art Should Be Regulated , Stupid Reasons Gamers Buy Bad Games that They End Up Hating , and 9 Video Game Series that Need to Die, but Keep Coming Back
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