Everyone has heard it before the phrase “Communication is the key!” The art of communication has less to do with making yourself understood by other people than it does with understanding what others are trying to convey to you. Mastering the listening skill will allow people to be more receptive to what you have to say when you are talking.
How to Listen
1. Looking directly at the person’s face and make good solid eye contact. (Not to the point where it creeps everyone out.)
2. Smile appropriately but not continuously.
3. Be on their level: Sit or stand at the same height.
4. Lean forward toward the speaker.
5. Pay close attention and don’t look away to stare at something else.
6. Make sure that the person has finished speaking before you begin speaking or turn away.
How to Be Charismatic
There are always two parts of the equation and the first you have just read was to pay attention and listen, even if you do not want to, just by them seeing you pay attention will put you in a more favorable position. Since you listen to people well, now the other half of the equation is to get people to be interested enough to listen to you. Never talk down to anyone, even if you are considerably more knowledgeable about the topic being discussed than they are. People need to feel respected in all aspects. Remember people’s names and play it in your head over and over because if you’re at a gathering and have forgotten somebody’s name, discreetly ask someone else whether they can give you the person’s name. Worst case scenario, and you end up having to introduce someone whose name you’ve forgotten, smile and say, “I apologize. I recognized your face right away, but I’m terrible with names.”
Always be kind but serious and don’t let the little annoyances get on your nerves to affect your manners where it shows the most. Everyone loves compliments and so do you, so offer it and be sincere. Try to be respectful and considerate by offering help and don’t turn it down when it’s offered in return.
Body Language Primer
A good amount of information is conveyed by the way we use our bodies and it targets specific moods that anyone can read right away. Hand and facial gestures are key components of our communication system and interact with words to convey meaning.
1. Open Arms and Hands: Convey openness and honesty. Try not to fold your arms across your chest because a negative signal posts a negative barrier between you and the person you’re speaking to.
2. Relaxed Face: Furrowed brows, clenched teeth and tight lips are all signs we know well for someone how is very unhappy. One who struggles to smile tends to display a “lopsided” smile and it’s less likely to be sincere than a more natural side-to-side grin.
3. Eye Contact: If you look close enough, a person’s pupils dilate when they smile at you and it means that they are genuinely happy. If you see the pupils constrict then you better watch out and get the clue that it’s a feeling.
4. Lower-body Language: Those that are tense who try to seem relaxed concentrate on their upper body and face. Look at the person’s legs and hips if you want the real full story. If their arms and face are relaxed but their legs and feet are tensed or crossed, believe the legs.
Good communication is always the key to a happy friendship, healthy relationship, and most importantly getting what you want be charisma, but the right way. Getting along with people will tend to make you worry about the smaller things and you are less likely to have stress because of full interaction.