When somebody recently made reference to the fact that I talk too much, I began to wonder if there is such a thing as addiction to talking, so a-Googling I went.
Sure enough, I found an article by a Margaret Paul, PhD., who claims that there is such a think as addiction to talking. Dr. Paul says that people who talk incessantly are seeking attention and approval from others, that they drain the listener of energy and that they often bore people who often listen reluctantly to avoid hurt feelings.
She further states that incessant talkers are often needy, empty inside and often lonely people. Talking gives them a sense of fullness. They feel falsely loved and accepted when they have a captive audience. Incessant talkers often think that they are extremely interesting and go on and on about themselves and what they think, believe or feel. They don’t realize that nobody wants to hear it and people tend to shy away from them and thereby they perpetuate their own loneliness and isolation.
After reading this, I began to think about myself, the ultimate blabber-mouth, and why I can’t shut up and I realized that there may actually be an underlying problem with what I perceived as me simply being upbeat and talkative. I began to consider how my constant philosophical waxing, sociological tirades, pop culture profiles, outrage at personal affronts and free psycho-analysis may make those around me feel.
In an article entitled , “Dealing With An Incessant Talker” by Seth Mullins (AssociatedContent.com), he contends that the best way to deal with such an incessant talker is to extricate yourself from them. He used the phrase “External Processor” to describe a person that talks non-stop and suggests that they do so because instead of thinking about things internally, they process everything by talking about it to any willing or even unwilling listener. His idea to rid your life of everyone that talks too much is a bit extreme and unrealistic as that person could be your spouse, parent, child, mate or boss. You can’t just throw another person away because they talk too much even if they are driving you insane. Perhaps talking to them about talking too much is a more viable solution. There is nothing wrong with tactful honesty and open discussion between human beings. Is the person who talks too much at fault or the person who does not talk enough because they fear confrontation or repercussions they may feel unequipped to handle? Think about it?
Conclusion: After my research and taking myself into consideration, I am definitely a blabber-mouth.
So what am I going to do about my own incessant talking and external processing? For now, simply be more aware of it, shut the hell up sometimes and listen more, work on calming my mind and accepting the fact that all knowledge, brainstorms and personal epiphanies do not need to be shared all the time, being less of a wordy-birdy and not going into tedious and often irrelevant details about everything. As Archie Bunker often told his wife, Edith, I shall “stifle myself”. I will squelch my seething, writhing gray matter and mute my over-abundant personality. Okay, I’m going to shut up now and go watch “Big Bang Theory”.
Link to “Dealing With An Incessant Talker” by Seth Mullins(AssociatedContent.com): http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/168458/dealing_with_an_incessant_talker_pg2.html?cat=15
Dr. Paul’s Article: http://addictions.rbtnc.com/Addiction_to_Talking.html)