There’s a new term in the air. It’s such a big term that it rips barbs through the hearts of mothers and fathers and silences the lonely tears of the young. Its conception is the result of the coming together of anger and fear so strong that it motivates one young person to pull at the flaws of any victim until those flaws cover an entire reflection as seen by the looker. Boys and girls so young they have yet to experience their first pimple, go to their first prom or get dizzy with their first kiss have chosen to avoid all those pleasantries and engrave one word deep in the hearts of parents-bullicide.
Bullicide is what is happening to children of all ages. Their acts of suicide were the fruits of the seed of bullying. These bullies want someone to feel so horrible that they are saturated in loneliness. They’ve gotten rather good at it and feel no shame when the result is death.
The hard knocks will claim that children need to toughen up. “Everyone gets teased” they’ll say. I fear for what those parents may learn about their children later.
Bullying isn’t something new. Bullies have been kicking sand in the mouths of…well, anyone they didn’t like, for centuries, probably as long as mankind has been around. Maybe it used to be a primal thing, a way to earn a mate? Who knows? Who cares? Today, bullying has gone to whole new level. We made it go there.
Parents have given up responsibility for the actions of their children. Teachers live in fear of persecution for correcting students on anything that has to do with personal choice. God is banned from our classrooms. The legal system is too busy creating more restraints for us to live within. In short, these children answer to no one. Worse, they seemingly had no one to guide them from the get go or they wouldn’t be in the position they are in now.
These days, children have the tools to bully in an entirely new way. There are laws to protect them. They laugh at the funerals that they are responsible for. In fact, it would seem that the public school system has turned into a breeding ground for hate and growing numbers of bullicide, or a suicide caused by the emotional torment suffered from being bullied.
As adults, we all too often forget what it was like to have emotions so strong, they seemed bigger than we were. We forget how much impact the word of a peer has on a child or teenager. We forget even those these are the basic rules of childhood development. Some of us even forget how hard it may be to look in the eyes of a concerned parent and scream inside all the things we couldn’t say out loud to them. We forget that sometimes saying “help me” can be so hard that the mouth dries up and the vocal cords freeze.
My son and I are very close and for now at least, he talks to me about everything. I hope that never changes, but I know that it could in the blink of an eye. I’ve given him my expectations and I have no problem backing him up as he tries to meet them. He is a strong child. He has no fear when he is defending someone he loves. I respect that.
In fact, his biggest fear is upsetting me or his father. He has gotten bullied and he has let it go because he didn’t want to get into trouble. He has been in situations where his teachers and even his principal did nothing about the bullying. I have given him permission to stick up for himself. Violence is never the answer, but I will not encourage my child to be defenseless in order to avoid a consequence. If he is touched, I expect him to stick up for himself and let me deal with the adults. And if it comes to the point where my son has to defend himself and is punished for it, then I imagine I will probably homeschool him again. If I cannot trust the people who are paid to educate and provide for the safety of my child, then he has no business being around them.
I’ve known a few people in recent years that have committed suicide. I’ve read in recent articles about children killing themselves because they were so badly harassed. I’ve read about a girl who could not even go to God in peace, but instead was ridiculed even in her coffin. I’ve cried for children I never even met and I’ve imagined my own child, scared and alone. This new term, bullicide, that should be found after the words “Cause of death” in so many recent deaths, it needs to be dealt with. It needs to end. Please open your eyes.