There are different types of stalkers who have their own reasons for doing the things that they do. There are those who stalk movie stars out of some delusion that they belong with that star. There are those who stalk because they admire a person that they have seen in real life. Some of the most dangerous stalkers are those lost love type stalkers. The relationship is broken off by one of the parties and the other one doesn’t want to let go. It isn’t always dangerous, but it can turn into the most dangerous game there ever was.
Different degrees of ex-love stalking:
Beginning of the breakup- When two people break up, there is usually one that doesn’t want to let go right away. The beginning of the breakup is the hardest part to get through. What some people might do in a desperate attempt to get the relationship back on track is to call, visit or email the ex-partner. The person who is doing it doesn’t see it as stalking, but rather, an attempt to try to mend the broken fences of the relationship. The person who is on the other end of it doesn’t quite see it that way. This could end within a very short period of time once the person has had a chance to get through the hurt of the breakup. Sometimes it gets worse and moves on to the next stage.
Escalating to Threats- If the stalking problem persists over a long period of time, the degree gets a lot worse. You will probably begin to get threats of bodily harm to you or to someone that you love. It is a form of abuse and it gets worse and worse as the perpetrator realizes they can’t control you. It is likely that you have already had the police involved or you are on the verge of getting the police involved and that is probably the best solution to the current problem you are facing. You may have had this in the early stages after the break up as well, but the threats have gotten worse and the person committing the stalking acts is probably getting braver about what he/she does since he/she has seen that he/she has gotten away with so much already. They begin to feel invincible and as though the police won’t do anything about the situation.
Escalating Actions- Stalking by an ex-love can escalate from trying to get the relationship back to threats. After the threats escalate, the actions of the stalker can become much more prominent. The stalker has likely already seen that they haven’t gotten caught and even if they have been, they often don’t care about the possible consequences. That is when the stalking becomes the most dangerous of all. The actions of the stalker become much more physical. He/she may begin to destroy property or physically confront that person or the people that surround the victim. This is when the stalking is at it’s most dangerous because the stalker has lost all touch with reality and doesn’t care what they do in order to try to push the person to enter the relationship again with them. The victim will sometimes give into the pressures because they are either tired of dealing with it or are afraid for their personal being or that of someone else. The stalker has no concept of the idea of moving on and they don’t care if they have the person with them only out of fear rather than out of love.
Once the stalker has taken on the final stage or behavior type, it has become far too dangerous to deal with on your own. This stage could occur from the beginning or it could gradually work into the more physical type of behavior. It is extremely important that those who feel they are being stalked to record the information in a log and to talk to the police, no matter how petty you think the police will view it. Every time you have to call the police on these types of behaviors, you are getting the information logged by the police and you can’t get a better source than that for evidence in a court case against the stalker. Always take this type of behavior seriously because it can escalate to levels that could cost your life.