Warning – these Patriot costumes for Halloween 2010, may appear insensitive and down-right offensive to some groups, but must be interpreted in the humorous light with which they are intended. Dedicated to the authentic American patriots I dialog with every day, who are the inspiration for these Patriot costumes. Have a fun celebration!
Flag Face Patriot
Decide whether you want your flag to hang right-side up or upside down, and position your blue box accordingly. Using colored theater (or Halloween) makeup sticks, carefully draw the blue corner and dot with a white stick for stars, and then draw red and white stripes.
Finish by wearing a patriotic flag shirt, to enhance the Patriot Flag Face. You could instead wear a flag bandana over your head, if you’re not the makeup type!
Tea Bag Patriot
Purchase a large box of tea bags, and either sew, staple, or tape them onto an old t-shirt to wear on Halloween, or to any patriotic rally! You will be remembered as a true Tea-Party Patriot.
Cracker Box Patriot
From an ordinary cardboard box, cut out a neck opening on the box bottom, and two armholes on either side, and then paint to match any favorite box of crackers. Allow to dry overnight and go Trick-or-Treating as a Patriot Cracka!
Gadsden Flag Patriot
On an old yellow t-shirt draw a coiled up rattle snake in black felt pen. To complete the look, walk around saying; “Don’t tread on me” in true Gadsden-Patriot form.
Opposing “Ground-Zero-Mosque” Patriot
Using two tall, thin cardboard boxes, tape together, and paint them blue. When dry, cut a gash out of one side and paint orange and yellow flames reaching up to the top. Using your child’s toy airplane, position it into the gap and strap over your heart.
Use a red hula hoop and a strip of red electrical tape pulled across and over its diameter. Hold in front of your twin-towers model, taped to your heart. No need to say anything, as your Patriot costume opposing the “Ground Zero Mosque” will speak for itself.
Disclaimer: Patriot costumes could become dangerous to your person, and it is strongly advised not to wear them anywhere near large gatherings of overly-insensitive, non-humorous, non-believers who may, or may or may not have disturbing issues, pertaining to low self-esteem, inner and/or outer fits of rage, inferiority complexes, open hostility, inflated egos, political corruption, or any other persons who have every right to practice backward, or ideological compulsions, by means of rocket or rock-throwing, in this great nation.