Many men have tocophobia, At first I thought it was fear of Mexican food, but that would be tacophobia. Then it sounded like a gum disease, maybe a bacteria found in your stomach and my last guess was Felix Tocophobia, the new second baseman for the Cubs .
Nope, as usual, I was wrong. Tacophobia is a man’s fear of childbirth. And to some scientists in Sweden this is a bad thing. Men should embrace child birth, accept it as a part of life and move on. So they are searching for a cure for Tocophobia.
Warning- Tangent Land ahead.
I am not a doctor, although I play one on TV. That is totally false, but I love that line. Except they never finish that thought in the TV commercial where some TV actor is pushing some medicine.
What that line really says, if you finished the whole thought, is ” I am not a doctor, although I play one on TV, but because we think you are really stupid, odds are good that you will buy this medicine even though my only medical training was that First Aid course when I was in Boy Scouts. Yes,” I am not a doctor but play one on TV” is a totally stupid line, but the sponsors of this commercial, figure that you have the brain of a Gerbil and will be so impressed by my handsome looks, that you will ignore the side effects of this medicine which include a 90 percent chance of your testicles shrinking and eventually falling off. But don’t worry. I am not a doctor, but play one on TV.
Okay exit stage left and we have left Tangent Land.
But I am not a doctor, but I really can’t see Tocophobia as being a major disease that researchers in Sweden have to study. Granted the winters are long in Sweden and it is probably a popular game among scientists to make up medical words, like Tocophobia and then apply for research grants.
But I would suggest that most men, if they have half a brain , would be tocophobic. Last time I checked, it costs about $250,000 to raise a child until they are 18 and it only costs 10,000 to raise a dog. Unless, of course, the dog wants to go to Canine College. But one can always hope the dog can get a scholarship by writing an essay on” The Attractions of a Fire Hydrant”.
So if the cost of raising a child doesn’t make you tocophobic, consider that when your wife is pregnant, you get to go to birthing classes, sit on the floor with your her and gaze into her eyes telling her that “I will be there for her”, when all you are really thinking is “What time did that baseball game begin and can I make it home by the eighth inning ?”
Another good reason to be tocophobic? Well besides the fact that having a kid is really like having a midget around your house that doesn’t pay rent for 18 years, men are forced to say stupid things when their wife is pregnant.
Like, “We are pregnant”.
Come on – “We are pregnant?”
Really? Last time I checked you weren’t wearing designer sacks, aka pregnancy clothes, you weren’t throwing up in the morning, and you didn’t have any labor pains.
But it is so cute when you say, ” We are pregnant.”
Anyway,I am glad that the scientists in Sweden are searching for a cure for Tocophobia, but I still maintain that the men who need help are the ones who really want to see their wives have a baby and watch their freedom and income sucked away so they can change some kid’s poopy diaper at three in the morning. Gee, where can I sign up for that duty?
Karolinska Institutet (2010, November 9). Psychoprophylaxis helps men with tocophobic — fear of childbirth. ScienceDaily. Retrieved November 10, 2010, from http://www.sciencedaily.com /releases/2010/11/101109081601.htm