Many relationships come to a natural conclusion either because of geographic distance, personal differences, or sometimes the purpose in eachothers lives have been fulfilled. There is nothing wrong with this. New people come into our lives, old friends stay, and many times we say fair well. This is the natural progression, as human beings only have time and emotional capacity to fit only so many meaningful relationships into their lives. It seems that in today’s busy world much of who we are is divided amongst work colleagues, acquaintances, and seemingly at the end of the list are those we love the most.
Facebook seems to be the key to holding every relationship you’ve had from conception to present time in stasis. In fact the words relationship and friendship are used loosely in cyber world. Looking at the profiles of others I can’t help but wonder if any of us could claim to have 7 282 “friends” in the pre Facebook era. In fact in the last year I have questioned whether it is healthy to keep everyone you have ever known on a cyber shelf where you can read their statuses about their cat having diarrhea or their failing marriage. On the flip side I question how many people I want to have a piece of me.
Now don’t get me wrong I have had some positive interactions on Facebook and some good laughs. However 99 percent of these interactions are with people I see outside of Facebook anyway. On the dark side I have had people misinterpret or write their own narratives based on private jokes they read on my wall or completely non serious statements. People have tried to engage in arguments or spread rumors based on Facebook because somehow Facebook has become more reliable than face to face conversation. I find this funny because my Facebook is almost entirely fictional or satirical so if anyone claims to know me via Facebook they may know an Avatar of me but certainly not the real me.
In the last 2 years I have cleansed over 3000 friends off of my list under the premise that acquaintances only require a 3 second “hello” when I may run into them at the grocery store. That nice girl I knew when I was 5 is now 30 and I only know how to play dolls with her. Most of the people I knew in high school are just faces in a yearbook to me now and anyone who I wouldn’t give my number to or go for coffee with probably has no place being labeled a “friend”
So here I am stuck in this space called Facebook. I stay on it because I do have family and friends I have fun with on here and like to keep contact with. The networking for charity work is invaluable. Even with that being said I am at the point of cutting any contacts that I do not speak to on Facebook and those that do not return messages. I only have so much time and space in my life and I want that precious time and space to be filled with mutually beneficial and soul nourishing relationships. Most of all what I want is real intimacy , a life of love and to experience these things through kind acts, touch, and mutual sharing — .frankly facebook is no substitute for the blessing and immense joy of real relationships.