Oh we just love our celebrities, don’t we? All their goings-on and carousing make for scintillating tabloid headlines and great water cooler gossip. And September seems to have an abundance of headlines to keep us yakking away. So let’s get started with the big story of the day, which is…
Lindsay Lohan Failed Her Drug Test
Just three short weeks out of jail and rehab, which was suppose to have cured her of all her addictions, the buzz is that Linds tested positive for cocaine. Parole violations are usually frowned upon, so I think the judge isn’t going to be too happy to hear about this latest turn of events. Something tells me the next round of jail and rehab time might be extended a bit too. I wonder if Lindsay’s mother is still saying that her daughter doesn’t have a drug problem. I’m sure some photographer will ask her the next time she’s out shopping or something.
Paris Hilton Accepts Plea Deal in HER Cocaine Debacle
Oh these silly celebrities and their love affair with cocaine. Poor Paris has so many friends who do cocaine, that somehow she always manages to pick up THEIR pocketbooks filled with cocaine instead of her own which, of course, doesn’t have ANY cocaine in there whatsoever. But since Paris didn’t want to miss any time from doing all the charity work that she promised she would do when she was let out of jail that time, she decided to plead guilty to two misdemeanors and avoid jail time. I think her lawyer will be getting a big fat raise.
That Top Gun Chick Found Another Chick That Takes Her Breath Away
Yes, it’s true. Apparently Kelly McGillis was just acting when she looked happy whenever Tom Cruise flashed his pearly whites at her, because in real life, Kelly found a woman named Melanie that she likes and they are planning to live happily ever after.
Who Knew Russell Brand Was A Modern Day Hero?
He doesn’t look the part, I know. But Russell and his fiancee, Katy Perry, were minding their own business, going through security at the airport, when all of a sudden, out of nowhere, a member of the paparazzi stuck his camera lens up Katy’s skirt. Right at that moment, Russell sprung into action and came to his fair maiden’s defense by apparently beating the crap out of the guy. Or at least that is the story that is being told today. I’ll bet Katy had a very special reward for Russell at the hotel that night. Good boy, Russell.
Adam Lambert Roughs Up Photographer Too
It certainly wasn’t a good week for the celeb camera guys, was it? The scoop is that Adam was relaxing on the beach with a few friends. When, all of a sudden, out of nowhere, just like the guy in Russell’s story, a photographer popped up and tried to take Adam’s picture. Since it was interfering with Adam’s relaxation time, and maybe because he didn’t have his eyeliner on, he decided to beat the crap out of the guy, just like Russell. Maybe this guy also tried to put his camera lens, or whatever, up Adam’s skirt or something, I don’t know. But Adam might get in trouble for this. Or maybe not. We’ll have to stay tuned. Paparazzi boys better beware though. Tempers are a-flarin’ these days amongst the stars.
Britney & Her Boys Hit The Mall
That’s it. Britney and her two sons went shopping at the mall. Seriously, they really did. Oh and she bought the boys some ice cream. I almost forgot that part. That was the whole article. …… I think Britney has really settled down, don’t you think?
Kim Kardashian & Her Mom Eat Ice Cream
Yes, they went to a Ben & Jerry’s together and bought ice cream, just like Britney and her boys, and they ate it. What makes this particular story so fascinating is that they did that in Paris, of all places. We, as the regular people, mostly buy our ice cream at the grocery store with a coupon, but not Kim and her Mom. No sirreee, they fly all the way to Paris to get some of the good stuff.
Octo-Mom’s House Is Going Into Foreclosure
It’s a rough economic time for those single moms out there. And poor Octo-Mom is one of them. Working hard, at what I’m not sure, well probably at doing lots of laundry, she is having a difficult time putting a roof over the heads of her fourteen children. She’s been wondering where she went wrong. Could be she shouldn’t have had so many babies planted inside her, but hey, it was fun back then. Cameras were flashing, people were interested. Now that’s all gone, and there’s only those fourteen little mouths to feed and Octo-Mom doesn’t seem to have a clue as to how to handle this latest setback. Since she’s in the headlines, maybe some do-gooder will come forth and help her. Hey, how about Paris Hilton! She’s probably looking for some new charity work to do. We should introduce them. I’m all about seeking solutions.
Morgan Freeman & Wife Divorce After A 26 Year Marriage
The article I read about this was difficult to read since it was so full of scandals. It’s Morgan Freeman. Doesn’t he usually play older, distinguished, integrity-filled characters in his movies? Well apparently those roles haven’t rubbed off into his real life. Whether this is true or not, the article said that Morgan had been having a decades-long affair with his step-granddaughter since she was a teenager. That fact annoyed the hell out of his wife, and it annoyed the hell out of his other mistress as well. So his wife divorced him, his other mistress left him, and who knows whether the step-granddaughter is standing by her man or not. It didn’t say. I guess Morgan will now resume his career playing older, distinguished, integrity-filled characters. But we may look at him a little differently next time.
Roberto Martinez Gives Birthday Cake To Ali Fedotowsky
I can’t help it. I’m a sucker for all the lovey dovey stuff between these two. I didn’t use to be a big fan of Ali’s, but I got caught up in all the romantic hoopla. It’s been several months now, and this Bachelorette and her hunky man are still together and seemingly still so in love. I think they’re just so damn cute together, that I can’t help but smile when I see the sweet gestures he makes toward her. His latest was surprising her with a birthday cake, with lit candles, while she was right in the middle of doing an interview on TV. Before that we saw Ali & Roberto cavorting in Sea World where Ali kissed a dolphin while Roberto smiled and showed his dimples. And before that, we saw pictures of them going in and coming out of a few Hollywood restaurants with Ali wearing her cute little rhinestone headbands and Roberto looking hot. I hope these two have a televised wedding. I will be there, in spirit, with bells on.
I wonder what antics our fave celebrities will be pulling during the coming autumn season. Will Lindsay be looking at the four walls of a jail cell? Will Paris and Octo-Mom become BFFs? Will the paparazzi keep their cameras out from under skirts? Will Adam Lambert finally get to relax in peace? And lord knows what horrors Morgan Freeman will do next. I hope those stories weren’t true about him. I’m still disturbed about it. A wife of 26 years doesn’t usually just decide to leave for no reason. See? I’m still thinking about it. I have to stop. Right now. Till next time…
Source: Yahoo OMG