I don’t eat meat- but I am a recently converted jerky lover. Ever since my fiance and his boy got a deer a few weeks ago and the jerky has been smoking on the porch with tender care, I have been sniffing around the dark red meat strips as they jerky up with surprising mouth-drooling anticipation. It’s weird- I not only don’t eat meat, I actually hate the flavor of it- normally. Until I tenderly tried a piece at his son’s insistence and fell in love with the smoky, peppery, juicy flavor. Heaven help me.
It is perhaps the best thing I’ve ever tasted- and it’s meat! It’s freakin BAMBI I’m putting in my mouth, and I can’t get enough of it. I’m actually digging in the freezer for the huge bucket of jerky and taking out thin, chewy strips of the luscious, flavorful meat and eating it like it’s chocolate. The kids have dubbed me the “Jerkytarian”, and watch in amazement as I devour strips of jerky like there is no tomorrow. Sheesh! What’s wrong with me?!
My fiance is like a proud papa. I tried his elk jerky last year and reluctantly admitted it was “yummy”, but stuck to my vegetarian “I hate meat” stance. This year, however, I have been looking forward to him jerky-ing up the deer as much as the kids. And this year, I am making up for 14 years of meat-less eating.
I was positive I was pregnant. I was absolutely rotten sure that I was having cravings. But a classic pee stick told me otherwise, and I have come to realize that while I hate all other meat, I can’t keep my greedy, carrot munching paws off the damn jerky. Oi vay…I am so ashamed…sort of.
Funny that just a few weeks ago I gagged on pea-sized bit of venison steak, and now I’m eating the same deer in jerky form and patting my fiance’s son’s back for a job well done on his kill, and asking my fiance when he’s going hunting again….cuz, uh…we’re running out of jerky. My goodness- what have these meat eaters done to me? I should pray for forgiveness from all the Bambis out there because I want to gnaw on them in all their jerky greatness. Oh, man…I am a bad, bad, human being.
So I guess I’m not a vegetarian after all. I’m a “jerkytarian”.