Picking a mentor will either lead your completely astray or get you so on track that even your highest expectations are surpassed. It is crucial to pick a good mentor and to pick one that suits your individual needs. You simply cannot receive proper advice about it should be from someone else. They do not understand the little quirks in your personality which requires certain traits in a mentor and not others. An “almost” fit is not good enough. So sit back, listen to your spirit and pay attention to the people who actually give an influence from which you act instead of thinking, finish instead of beginning.
Many people may inspire you, but only the ones who help you release your emotional attachments and issues and actually act on that inspiration are worth anything as mentors. For example, my sister’s mentor is an elderly gentleman who never takes anything personally, because she needs lighthearted, stress-free, drama-free realms of creativity. My own mentor is a multiple-time killer with a big warm heart, because I need someone who is not shocked by my actions and who is non-judgmental. I also need someone who is cold in the head, for I tend to over-think and allow my own warmth to override good common sense.
Habits are formed, not by doing something 21 or 47 days in a row, but by living with someone who has those habits. You see, habits come with circumstances. They do not just appear and disappear at random. Certain lifestyles lend themselves to certain habits and vice versa. When you live with someone who has a habit you desire, they are not just being a role-model to you for that particular thing. They are being a role-model for the lifestyle which surrounds, supports and upholds that habit. This is why having a mentor who actually gets you in action is a key role. Sometimes, it is only their influence and watching their own life. Sometimes, it is how they explain certain things in life to where you feel loved, accepted and educated. And occasionally, the more forceful method of bitching you out until you grow a backbone or straighten up is required.
Again, there will be many people who will inspire you. Sort through these people, listen rather than talk, and be brutal in your evaluations. After all, your mentor will have a very strong impact on your life and you do not want to be stuck with second-best. Pick a mentor who has habits you would like to have and who does not indulge in things which you consider weak or pathetic. They are not necessarily someone you have a great desire to surpass in life, but if you have a competitive spirit, then you might consider someone you would like to eventually match and then beat at the game of life. Your mentor does not have to be long-term, but you will find that the better your pick, the longer they will be useful to you.
Picking a mentor is exciting and can seem like a large task. Do not worry. There are millions of people to choose from, and you will find a perfect match along your journey of searching. Remember, you may someday graduate from your mentor and you will have to find a new one. Do not let loyalty hold you back when you could be improving yourself.