The question of whether or not Beyonce is pregnant makes me think of one thing. This one thing I’m thinking might seem like more than one thought, but trust me, it’s all intertwined. I’m thinking of a cumbersome knot.
Is Beyonce pregnant? Who knows? Should she be? How did she get pregnant, if indeed she is? How are babies made?
I certainly hope she isn’t pregnant. In fact, I hope pregnancy disappears altogether. In fact, I propose, as a perspicacious human being, that humans completely, wholly, one hundred percent halt the production of babies. I propose the human species be mandatorily banned from having any more babies. I call for a ten year moratorium on baby production.
Yes, it’s ugly, but I’m going to stick by it. I know you like babies, but I’m going to carry on.
For ten years, no more human babies. Let the animals rebound. Let the earth rebound. Let Mother Nature get her breath back. Enough bullshit and destruction. No more babies.
I even propose humans establish a one world government to get order rolling. We go back to worshipping the air, the trees, the animals, and water. Did you know, if the air gets so bad and we can’t breathe it, we die? It sucks, but we’re chained to it. And that chain is about three and half minutes long.
It’s not the end of the world, if the animals die. I know you realize the animals are all dying, but you think that is just something that happens. Somehow it’s not a real big deal. Some people even think it’s fake.
And then there’s water. Pretend our air is pristine (but it’s not, we’re actually at a 9% pollution rate, rising nearly a percent every year, and when we get to 22%, it’s over). Our water is foul, saturated with chemicals, pharmaceuticals, disinfectants.
Some of you are on birth control but you don’t know it.
I know you don’t care if the fish die, but I’m going to tell you, we need fresh drinking water. It sucks, but we’re strapped to clean drinking water. And that leash is only a few days long. Unless you’re Prahlad Jani (Doctors Baffled by Prahlad Jani, Man Who Doesn’t Eat or Drink). Impossible! you say. You’d better hope Prahlad Jani’s ‘miracle’ isn’t impossible, for your sake, the way humanity is going.
So, is Beyonce pregnant? I hope not, and I hope nobody else is pregnant, either. I hope it ends for ten years, I hope the human madness lessens, and the planet’s death sentence is revoked.