Every time I come across an online article on LeAnn Rimes lately, comments on the article are often from hundreds of women calling her a ‘homewrecker’. LeAnn Rimes, who was married herself at the time, according to these women lured actor Eddie Cibrian away from a perfectly happy marriage with his wife of eight years, Brandi Glanville. Therefore, LeAnn Rimes is a homewrecker. But, is she really? And what’s with the trend of calling the woman who ends up with a formerly-married man a ‘homewrecker’, yet there’s little mention of the guy’s role in the break up of his marriage? Why do so many women absolve the husband of responsibility?
LeAnn Rimes met Eddie Cibrian when they both starred in the movie ‘Northern Lights’. The couple started an extra-marital affair and eventually Rimes left her husband and Cibrian left his wife. They’ve been together ever since with talk of marriage in the near future. So, does this make LeAnn Rimes the ‘homewrecker’? Of course not, Rimes is not any more at fault than Eddie Cibrian. Both were married, both made the choice to be involved in an extra-marital affair and both left and divorced their spouses. So, this idea put forward by legions of hysterical women that LeAnn Rimes is the ‘homewrecker’ is ridiculous.
Why is it though a majority of women seem to blame the ‘other woman’ when a marriage breaks up, or particularly when their marriage breaks up? It’s as though they believe men have no brains and are simply led by their penis, so when another woman comes along, it’s not the man’s fault he leaves his wife. It’s the other woman’s. It’s simple really.
When a man leaves a woman for someone else, whether its a woman herself, a friend or someone she knows, she never wants to admit she did something wrong or there was something lacking in the woman that made her husband leave. In all marriages, most problems are a 50-50 responsiblity so, if there are problems in the marriage, both parties are usually to blame. The wife as much as the husband.
But, when a man leaves his wife, it’s less painful for the wife to say the other woman was the ‘homewrecker’ so as not to admit any fault or blame herself. If she blames the husband however, then that means there was a problem in the marriage itself. Blame the ‘other woman’ means no fault in the marriage, just the other woman’s fault. It is, however, a crock.
Marriages have problems, marriages fail and sometimes the husband (and the wife), have been unhappy for years. They’ve stayed because of the kids or because of a sense of duty, only to wake up and realize life is too short when the husband meets another woman or the wife another man and falls in love. That’s what usually breaks up marriages. Not the ‘other woman’ (or even the ‘other man’) but the circumstances of the marriage itself.
Add onto that the fact most happily married men likely wouldn’t leave their wife, and you can see immediately why the marriage is at fault and not the ‘other woman’.
You can see how ridiculous the idea of calling another woman a ‘homewrecker’ though is, when you look at a case where a woman leaves her husband for another man. In this case, does the other man become the ‘homewrecker’ in the eyes of others, just like the ‘other woman’ would be. Of course not, it’s still the woman who’s at fault as, this time, she left her husband. In the 21st century, you’d really think women would have stopped buying into the idea of blaming women for everything – it’s no different than a woman in Iran being stoned to death for ‘adultery’. It’s just the same in the west, except the stoning is done by words.
In the case of LeAnn Rimes, yes she ‘wrecked a home’, her own home as it turns out but, if she’d been remotely happy with her then-husband, it’s doubtful she would have left him for Eddie Cibrian. She married at the age of 19 so, by the time she met Eddie Cibrian, LeAnn Rimes was 28 years old and had probably outgrown the marriage that seemed so perfect when she was still a teenager.
People grow and people change and just because a marriage breaks up and a new partnership forms, it doesn’t mean another woman is a ‘homewrecker’. It only means, for whatever reason, the people who left their marriages decided they would be happier outside of it than in it, even if it means leaving someone they’ve been married to for years. Not homewrecking, Simply life.