Welcome back! It’s Friday and I am sure you are dying to discuss the adventures of our friends from Beverly Hills. This week the ladies had a birthday party duel and we got to meet their kiddo’s. Well, everybody’s kids except Camille’s, they were with their nannies. All right lets jump on into this dirty little cry me a river episode shall we….
Taylor’s baby girl is turning 4 so Taylor like every loving mama is throwing herself, I mean her daughter a birthday party. This simple little Alice in Wonderland themed tea party is kicking in at around 60 large. Yes, for a kids birthday party. Um okays, I was thinking maybe a pony ride and some cake but hey to each their own.
Taylor, in the midst of all her planning needs to get her baby girl a birthday present and what says happy 4th birthday better than diamonds. Taylor hits up her local jeweler and get matching Barbie necklaces. How could she not, girlfriend is creating a memory. Awesome. Wrap ’em up.
This party had nothing to do with lil’ what’s-her-face, this is all about Taylor. I mean really she was the one who gave birth, so beyotch bring on the bubbly. We get to see Taylor in her mad hatter attire, standing on the table having her picture taken, hanging with fairies, and totally making it all about her. The poor kids birthday song even included her pretty mommy. I don’t even remember seeing Kennedy after the first 5 minutes. Oh yes that’s right Kennedy running away screaming, poor thing was looking for her pony…Uh-huh told ya bish.
Just when you think it can’t get any worse Russell comes in with his present for Kennedy. He bought her a puppy, even though he and Taylor had already agreed NOT to get the puppy. For real Russell is the least likable human on earth, next to Camille of course. Russell gives me the chills in a serial killer type of way. He’s the guy that when you see him in a parking lot, you put your keys in between your fingers just incase you need to jab him in the eye. Yuckers.
Here is the deal with Taylor though, she gets back at her husband by spending his money. Good for you girl. Taylor is kind of like, I have to deal with his cold, black heart EVERY day. No, it’s ok honey go golfing and leave me solo by the pool in Vegas, I’ll just go and buy a small island off the South Pacific. Hey a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do.
Kyle is also having a party for her daughter on the same day as Taylor and tells us how ridonculous Taylor’s party is every chance she gets. Oh Alice in Wonderland, everyone is doing that, bish please. Oh fairies flying around seen it a hundred time…
Kyle’s party was way more kid oriented with a jumpy house, petting zoo, kid friendly food, and no booze for the adults but my Lord, that girl is jealous of everyone and everything. The only person she isn’t jealous of is Kim, and because of this she treats her like hired help. Oh you’re moving, too bad I need help with my party. Oh we’re in a group of people,are let me publicly humiliate you for my own twisted pleasure. As soon as she started talking people started looking for the booze. Trust.
Her jealousy pours out when she talks about money too. Oh how foolish to spend all that money. I would never do that….Blah, blah, blah. Oh girl if you had it you would spend it. Don’t hate the playa hate the game.
Kim finally found her house. Yay. Nothing more on Kim. When is she going to get a story line? I can give her a story line. Round house your sister Kyle in the face next time she acts like a rude beyotch to you.
Let’s not forget Kelsey Grammer’s wife Camille, she does so much more than everyone else that she needs to go on a vacation. I mean really, she shops more than anyone, she sleeps more than anyone and she leaves her kids in the hands of her 4 nanny’s more than anyone else. So off to Hawaii we go.
In Hawaii, Camille and her boobs bring some perverted old homeless man into the jacuzzi so he can shower her with compliments. Oh but our little saint Camille isn’t done nope, she has her friend tell us how charitable she and Kelsey can be. ” Tell them, tell them how we took your broke azz in when you had nothing. We gave you a car, food, a place to live, go on tell them.” This all stems from the Jesus complex that Camille has, as she tells us in the life according to Camille segment. Right, I can see Camille sitting there wondering what would Jesus do?
Oh my girl Lisa, I will say it again, I LOVE me some Lisa. Lisa took a tour of both birthday parties and definitely was Team Kyle. Her kiddos grew up in the English country side so they never had goodie bags filled with diamond necklaces or a tea party that cost 60K. Lisa is looking around asking where the hell is the pin the tail on the donkey?
At Lisa’s birthday lunch she gets a surprise visit from her son who is at boarding school. Max was shipped off to keep him out of trouble because it seems Max may be a bit of a pot head. So off he went and within a week Lisa had the shingles.
So what do we get to look forward to next week? Next week we get to see Kyle and Camille got at each other again which is always fun!