I used to hate acrostics, you know the first letter or each line spells out a word or phrase. For example:
Gone is my love
Every is my heart sorrowful
Thank God For You
Love Who I Have Finally Found
Oh be still my beating heart
Save me from Myself
Thankfully I embrace you.
Well, that is my acrostic poem and if that ain’t touching I don’t know what is. But I have been against acrostics because I find them Cute Oh Wow. Whoops – did you see how clever I was? Take the first letters of Cute On Wow and they spell COW.
You see, I am reforming already. Instead of being grumpy, I have made a decision to embrace acrostics and no matter how acrostics trigger my gag reflexes, I will incorporate them in my articles from now on. This will accomplish three things – it will show my readers what a clever writer I am, my readers can spend many merry hours searching for the acrostics buried in my articles and it will firmly convince my readers that I really need to stop drinking so early in the evening, afternoon, okay the morning.
Now here is a hint. I am not really that clever, so I will have to limit my acrostics to the word CAT. For example: Catch Another Tiger. Can’t Avoid Ticks. Can Apply Today, Cannibals Are Terrific. Canned Apples Tasty. Cantaloupes Are Tangy.
Well as you can tell from the very clever phrases above, I obviously have a knack for acrostic writing or I Can’t Accept Truth, which is that I may be very delusional.
And to be very truthful, I don’t care how much you or I drink, if I wrote Careful Acrostics Tastefully, we would all be gagging by the second paragraph of any article I write. Not that we don’t do that anyway.
So it is with a heavy heart that I Can’t Avoid Telling, that I must end my short career in acrostic writing, thus preventing us all from turning into alcoholics by noon.
Cows Are Thankful.
Hmm, maybe I do have a knack after all?