The Bible is old torn and tattered. It is a King James Version. The cover is torn off the Bible from many years of use. There is writing on nearly every page of the Bible. Thoughts from a man long past. Thoughts from a friend I lost over three years ago.
The Bible has been collecting dust in my closet for three years. I read my own Bible daily, but I couldn’t bear to touch the old torn and tattered Bible of my friend. When he passed, I was saddened more than I could have ever imagined. I had many sleepless nights. I remember waking up in the middle of the night, anxious. I wasn’t sure what was more painful. Being there for seven years and watching my friend die or dealing with his death.
Finally, in February on our trip to the Philippines everything came to a head. I had an anxiety on the plane and was anxious for nearly all of the eighteen days of our trip. I decided it was time for me to take a few steps closer to God. I mean I worshipped God, but I didn’t allow myself to get too close.
In the Philippines I found Associated Content and decided to write. This made me break out the songs I wrote with my friend before he died. Looking at the songs brought back wonderful memories. My friend in Indiana on the phone and I on the other end here in Florida. We talked everyday about God, politics and writing songs. He taught me how to write songs.
One day, I found the old torn and tattered Bible on a shelf in my closet. I finally had the courage to take it out and look at it. I was amazed at how torn up the Bible was. I was amazed at all the writing my friend had done within the pages of the Bible. This was my friend’s own personal Bible. Every thought he had about God was written down within the pages of this Bible. He left part of himself with me in the old torn and tattered Bible.
My friend was the one who led me back to God. I had fallen away and was angry at God. I did not care if I was alive or dead. My friend was always there for me. I was always there for him until the end. Finally, I realized something. My friend gave me this old, torn and tattered Bible for a reason. He did not want me to place it into the closet to collect dust. He wanted me to open the pages of the Bible (his Bible) and read the word of God. He left me a part of himself that will always be here with me. He left me the most important part of him. My friend left me a diagram of his own personal relationship with Jesus within the pages of this old torn and tattered Bible.
The old, torn and tattered Bible is now open. I am slowly reading the Bible along with the thoughts my friend wrote within its pages. I no longer have to mourn for my friend. He is alive within the pages of this old torn and tattered Bible. He is alive in Christ. He is alive for eternity. My friend is alive inside of my heart.