This edition of The Poseur’s Guide To…is directed toward those who want assume the mantle of woodworking expert without necessarily knowing the difference between a miter and mortise. (What, you worry? Keep reading and you’l learn to tell vive la difference between a miter and mortise. It’s a pretty big chasm.)
A dado is a term that woodworking poseurs should really learn to toss around as casually as Paris Hilton tosses aside underwear. A dado is nothing more complicated than a wide slot or groove used for joining together pieces of wood.
Get to know your lumber defects if you really want to pull off being a woodworking poseur. A pin knot is a small blemish less than a half inch in diameter. As in: “That pin knot is kind of like the extra weight that Marilyn Monroe was carrying in Some Like It Hot; maybe not desirable per se, but it doesn’t ruin the package in and of itself.”
It may sound like a rapper’s name, but toenail is something completely different in woodworking and carpentry. Use toenail as a verb to mean that you are going to fasten with diagonally driven nail from the side of a one board into the flat of another board.
(Completely inappropriate digression: Diagon Alley in the world of Harry Potter translates into diagonally. Think about it.)
To score something is merely to mark it for cutting. Scoring can result in notches or line drawing or even cut itself if one with an awl.
How we Southerners pronounce the word “all.” An awl is also a very sharp pointy sticky thingie that looks like an icepick except it has a rounded bulb-shaped handle.
Insert your own joke here. A butt hinge is simply any regular old flat hinge of the type found in any home.
You will know you are a real woodworking poseur when you toss around this term. It is short for tongue-and-groove boarding.
Tongue and Groove:
You know that boarding where one pieces slides into another piece? This here thing is that there thing.
The miter is a joint that is formed by an angle of two beveled pieces of wood.
A mortise is a hole that is cut into one piece of wood to receive a tenon that protrudes from another piece of wood to create a really nifty bonded joint.
A tenon is the protruding piece of wood that fits into the mortise