Much advice has been given when it comes to finding the right person for you and some have proved valuable yet inconclusive. Please let it be said that I am not a dating or relationship expert and I do not play one on television but I do have experience in this matter and have opened myself up to learning not only from my mistakes but those of others that I have witnessed over the years. It must never be mistaken as to the real reason why many of us troll the bars and nightclubs, churches and social gatherings.
The main reason that we say we do these things is to find someone but that is not entirely true. Finding that perfect person means that you will be looking for the rest of your life because that perfect person does not exist. You may find another with whom you have a lot in common but with all things, that commonality shall soon fade and one must then ask themselves, what will happen next. While many of us do not exercise our ability to forecast the future, we often times search for reasons to disregard our current partners in order to find that one which is much different than the one currently on our minds. It’s like getting that new car that you have always wanted. The thrill of having it means that you now dedicate a lot of time and effort to keep it clean and running well but when you see the newest model, the one that you would have died for is now shelved and the dream to get the newest one becomes your focus.
While that perfect person does not exist, you can make your current relationship as close to perfect as humanly possible but it will take some work and there in lies the rub. Many want perfection but are not willing to put in the effort to obtain it. Two people who think the same way in every situation does not a perfect relationship make. If that is the case then you are looking more at a convenient and hassle-free type of relationship than you are that perfect one. A real relationship is one where each of you will grow and learn more each day that you are together. It is the sharing of ideas without the aggression and a true understanding of the others opinion without compromise. Many experts say that communication is the key but I say that while communications are very important, the key to a perfect relationship is the ability and willingness to accept that you do not know everything and that the opinion of others are quite valuable and essential.
When you are searching for that perfect person to share your life with, you must be looking for someone with whom you can grow and learn from. Trolling areas where those of interest dwell to find the right person is often overshadowed by, frankly, just trying to get “laid” and that will never give you what you say you seek. I have been involved in a relationship with this lady for over 10 years now and she would attest that it has not been easy. We first refused to change from the person that we were most comfortable with and from that many unnecessary and honestly stupid argument arose. In the early stages we would even use anger to say enough and break up; only to then remember that the good times together far outweighed the bad. We learned that many photo albums are only filled with smiles and not frowns so to see them you would assume a happy existence but truthfully, a worthy relationship should be worth the pain.
In many relationships, the excuse to discard your mate is that sometimes people fall out of love with each other and that is a lie. If there was real love in the beginning, it will still be there in the end. Convince yourself that you have fallen out of love with the other but then ask yourself why ex’s sometimes crosses your mind when you hear a particular song or detect a particular smell. This is what we need to use when it comes to finding the love again. When we say that we have fallen out of love, the thought is closely followed by all of the bad things that occurred in the relationship. This is a clear clue because if we are honest with ourselves when you think of the good times, a smile can creep across our faces without warning. That’s the love people and it never goes away.
Instead of seeking to extend your conquest, start thinking of if that person will help you to grow and if you can learn something through them. If the answer to that question is yes, then you are well on your way to a perfect relationship. Be prepared to fight to keep that relationship because in the end it will save you more times than it will sink you. No longer will you have to struggle to get understanding because understanding will be standing right next to you. No longer will you struggle to get someone to listen because the perfect ear will be right there for you. No longer will you ever have to go it alone because the best partner in the world stances within reach. In order to get good at anything, one has to practice and work at it and the same goes for that perfect relationship. It will not make you a millionaire nor fix all of the world’s problems but a near-perfect relationship will make you view things in a brighter light which in some cases will make you the riches person on this earth.