Recently, Google has been experimenting with a type of autopilot for cars which allows drivers and passengers to sit back while the computer does the driving. The Google car, which has an odd assortment of lasers and sensors mounted on top of it, has been videotaped chugging along on the highway with minimal human guidance. However, besides just keeping your car in the right lane, the new Google car has a number of special bonus features. Ten of them are listed below.
1. Google’s “Back Seat Driver” audio commentary will give pertinent driving tips and will help lone drivers pass the time on the freeway.
2. A new reflective digital screen technology will allow the driver to surf the Internet by simply looking at the windshield while the autopilot does the hard work of driving the car.
3. A steering wheel with an integrated keyboard will allow drivers to send tweets to their friends from the roadway, such as “OMG! My autopilot has gone batty!”
4. The new Google GPS guidance system, called Gertrude 5.0, has what Google refers to as the “most sarcastic voice” available in a GPS guidance system. As opposed to other GPS units, the Gertrude 5.0 also makes random sarcastic comments based upon your ability to get your car to a given location.
5. The Google drive-through window voice amplifier. This technology allows drivers to talk to people inside of a McDonald’s and Taco Bell without the use of a conventional two-way speaker system by using a 150 dB loud speaker mounted in the car’s trunk.
6. The new Google car is also expected to come with a powerful electromagnet which will allow the car to, “piggyback”, on other cars and trucks by magnetically sealing the front bumper to metallic objects in front of it.
7. If you are to tired, or sleepy, to Twitter inside your Google car, you can select the, “auto-Twitter” function which will send automated tweaks to your twitter account such as, “cruising along at 60 mph on I-95.”
8. The Google car will be fitted with a special fighter jet grade ejection seat just in case the autopilot fails to respond to your commands.
9. Rumors abound that Google will install secret monitoring equipment in each car that will monitor intra-car conversations to figure out what people are interested in searching for on the internet.
10. The Google car will be equipped with a space-age milkshake maker which uses liquid nitrogen, flavoring and powdered milk to make shakes for long cross-country trips.
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