I was up late Sunday night watching cable after running around all weekend at one industry event after another and a full day of church on Sunday. I came home ate and passed out for a few hours and now I was up for the night. I caught up on all the football scores watched the second half of the Patriots- Chargers game and eventually ended up watching a movie on HBO called, ‘˜Walk The Line.’ It was a movie on the life of singer Johnny Cash.
Watching the movie especially about the early part of his career, driving from city to city with other stars of the era, Elvis, Jerry Lee Lewis and June Carter, reminded me of when I first got in the game. Doin shows in all kinds of small joints, goin from city to city with other new artists.
Even when Johnny Cash performed at Folsom maximum security prison reminded me when we performed in the Brooklyn House Of Detention. It was part of new a new trial program of bringing entertainment to the jails.
At first I started to reminisce about the days on the road, the shows, the stage, the crowd screaming your name and rapping along with you word for word, every word of your song. I saw groups who came after us and even a few we helped get started go on to make much more noise and become more famous and I used to try to figure out why.
While watching Walk The Line seeing Johnny Cash trouble with drugs, how he almost died a few times, how he lost his family made me realize a lot of things. There was a good chance that had we actually blew up to the real big star, while I would be loved by millions, what my life could have been.
I really didn’t have much stability in my life and was running wild. I kinda rebelled from the church. And there is a real good chance I could have been one of the young stars with more dollars than sense.
It made me realize how God had other plans for me, how God was protecting me from myself, because had He let me have what I was really after, I probably wouldn’t be the person I am today and be just another black celebrity we read about in trouble with drugs, alcohol and much more.
Before I gave my life to Christ as an adult about 10 years ago, God was watching over me and protecting me. It reminded me of something I heard years before, that God watches over babies and fools. Well I was way too old to be considered a baby but was most certainly a fool. Like I have written many times I am so glad God’s still hears a sinner’s prayers.
How many times has God not given us what we want for our own good.