My mom allowed me to wear lip gloss only to school when I was 12. By the time I hit 18, that was all I was wearing. From my experience, if you keep it simple and allow your daughters to wear minimal makeup to school by the time they hit Junior High, the novelty of wearing makeup just wears off. As it stands, out of 4 sisters in my family, only one of us puts makeup on every now and then and the rest of us (myself included) rarely doll up, if ever.
Allow your teenage daughter to wear simple basics if they’d like, and strongly encourage natural beauty. Of course, it helps if you yourself don’t pancake the makeup on. Your daughters will want to wear makeup because their mom does. My mom puts on eyeliner and that’s pretty much it, so we didn’t grow up with a Mary Kay mom who spent hours dolling herself up.
As your teenage daughter ages, she’ll want to put on makeup more often, and more of it. My fiance’s 14 year old is only allowed to wear lip gloss and light eyeshadow on Sundays to church, and is not allowed to wear makeup to school. As she gets older, she’ll graduate to eyeliner and mascara, but we let her know how beautiful she is just as she is because we are hoping to avoid the raccoon caked on look that so many young girls are into.
A common rule a lot of parents follow is that they’ll let their daughters wear makeup to school if other parents allow their daughters to wear makeup. Daughters often complain that their friends’ parents allow them to wear makeup, so it’s easy to cave. However, the less makeup you let your daughter wear, the more likely she will be to not rely on makeup to build her confidence.
Our rule of thumb with the girls is basically that they will be wearing lip gloss, eyeliner and maybe mascara only until they are out of the house, in which they can wear whatever they want. But until they are grown, there is no need to be wearing makeup, and it should be a privilege you present to your daughters if they can prove responsibility, self respect, and self awareness. We have the 14 year old explain to us why she wants to wear more makeup (which is usually peer pressure) and we counteract that peer pressure is no reason to do anything. Until she can say she wants to wear mascara because she just likes it, it will remain a no go. She needs to realize the difference between wanting to do something because she wants to rather than because it’s what will make her more acceptable to her peers before we’ll let her venture forward with makeup experimentation.
Believe me, your daughters will not become the laughingstock of the whole school, never get a date, or have no friends because they don’t wear makeup. I never wore makeup in High School, and neither did any of my sisters, and we never even thought about it because my mom made it no big deal. We didn’t grow up with a butt load of makeup in our house, so putting on a face in the morning never became routine for any of us.
In the end, it’s YOUR decision on whether or not you will allow your daughter to wear makeup at all, and you get to decide how much and how often. If your daughter can’t deal with that, tough. It’s not going to kill her to present herself more naturally, and she’ll likely grow out of her need for makeup and realize over time that beauty is not created with dolling up your face. I’m grateful I never really got into wearing makeup (I went through a phase for about a year) and really don’t care about presenting myself in any way other than just my face. If I was allowed to wear makeup throughout High School, I might be thinking differently, so it’s something to consider when you’re thinking about letting your girls wear makeup to school.