This is a poem about the last moment you see someone before they pass away. When you look back at that moment in which you treasure, you often wonder was there any inclination that it was the end? That moment becomes imbedded forever within your heart.
I imagine you lying still
In your rusty maroon corduroy pants
and falling off the shoulder cotton white shirt,
slightly smiling, like you knew the secret all along.
Your sunflowered golden hair that twirls into ringlets
of soft silken strands surround your
pale pasted face of plaster and pain.
Your eyes were closed,
like you saw it coming all along.
Like you knew the ice was too black
and the early dismissal was too good to be true.
We never built that snowman we said we would
And now when the first snow falls
I no longer think of Christmas, snowmen and crisp air
I think of that street, his black car and your curls.
I think of a sunflower poking abruptly from a snow pile
that attempts to mark your beauty,
but only marks the moment
when I lost my best friend.
Did you know?
Did you feel it coming?
Because when I look back at the moment
when you wisped your head around
to say, “I love ya” in that raspy, pissed off
high school voice…
it seemed so perfect,
like it was a very planned out.
A front-of-the-mirror, hair bush kind of practice “goodbye.”
Your head dipped into the car
and you were shadowed by the ominous chalked sky
and cotton coated snow.
The only light came from your turquoise eyes
that seemed to pop against the winter emptiness.
They flashed as if taking a picture of one last memory.
You felt it coming.
Love always, Sarah.