Women tend to apologize for things that they shouldn’t and, many times, the apology is directed to a man they’re involved with. It’s no surprise considering many women were, and still are, expected to keep their opinions to themselves, stay silent by their man’s side, feel guilty for saying no and feel bad about engaging in anything that seems indulgent. Over the years, societal pressures have relaxed a bit but still, many women find themselves experiencing unnecessary guilt and making apologies, especially to their man. While some apologies are necessary, there are certain things a woman should never apologize for.
Going out with friends
Friends are important whether you’re in a relationship or you’re single. If your man is giving you a problem about you seeing your friends, especially if you see him often, it’s an issue to immediately handle. It’s a sign of trust issues and a controlling nature among other problems. While you should deliver an appropriate amount of time to the relationship, it’s also important to allocate personal time to other loved ones.
It’s a sad fact that some men are uncomfortable with successful women. Even if the man considers himself successful, he may try to douse the woman’s happiness about her own achievements. In some cases the woman will feel guilty all on her own. You earned your success, so enjoy it without any negative feelings.
Whether it’s walking away from a job that makes you unhappy or an abusive relationship, never apologize for walking away from something that makes you unhappy. You are with yourself every hour of every day and no one has to deal with your unhappiness more than you do. No one needs to be in an unhappy situation if it’s something they can walk away from.
Personal style is just that; personal because pertains to the individual. A woman should be able to wear what she wants without anyone telling her that the style is not good enough. While there are dress code exceptions, for example what to wear to work or an event, if you feel comfortable in it and believe it looks good on you then you’re entitled to wear it and be happy without someone else telling you otherwise.
Having what your man doesn’t
Some women feel guilty when they’re in a relationship with a man and has some things he is currently lacking. Some of the guilt triggers may be a job, money, a house or a certain type of car. If he wants these things, he can strive to get them but you should never try to dim your light or feel bad for what you have just because your partner doesn’t.
Whether it’s skydiving or quitting to pursue a job you really want, you don’t owe an explanation to anyone for the risks you take if they involve only you. Life is too short to not pursue the type of life you want.
If you have certain thoughts, own up to them and don’t apologize especially if someone is asking for your opinion. While saying your opinion isn’t the best idea in certain circumstances, such as if you think your boyfriend’s penis isn’t as great as your ex’s, many times it’s okay to express how you feel. If other people don’t agree get upset, then they shouldn’t have asked in the first place.
Staying in pajamas
If you want to sit around in the middle of a Sunday afternoon in your pajamas curled up under a blanket while you watch old movies, then so be it. If your man gives you a problem, invite him to put on his pajamas and pull up a chair.
Liking what you like
Whether it’s reality television or a musician no one has heard of, you shouldn’t apologize for anything you like. If everyone liked the same things, the world would be pretty boring anyway.
Not reciprocating interest
You aren’t going to be attracted to every guy that expresses interest in you. If you don’t like someone in a romantic way, there’s nothing you can do about it. You may feel bad for the other person, but it isn’t something you can help and doesn’t require an apology.
If an ex, friend that betrayed you or someone else that you have no interest in speaking to contacts you and you avoid them, make no apologies for it. You should surround yourself with people you like, whether it’s friends or acquaintances and everyone else push to the side. Having people you dislike in your life will only bring you down.
You should offer an apology when you do something wrong, not when you’re being who you are. While everyone has some flaws, the person you’re with is supposed to love you for who you are not for who he wants you to be. Even if the guilt is all your own and wasn’t brought on by someone else, love who you are and reevaluate what you’re really apologizing for before you offer one. Your quirks, hobbies and traits make up who you are; those that truly care about you will still like you anyway and, if they don’t, show them the door. It’s too exhausting to hide who you are and what you like.