The prerequisite of failure is an unrealistic or limiting view of yourself in relation to society. Success is not determined by the strength of your abilities; it’s achieved by positive thinking. Success is almost impossible when you create a limited view of yourself as socially inadequate. You limit yourself when you choose to live by cultural conventions such as “Because I’m black I can’t do that.” Living with these attitudes and beliefs will limit your options to personal success. And an optimistically unrealistic view of your importance will make you believe you’re entitled to everything without the hard work.
Your personal attitudes, if they are unrealistic, can paint false pictures of reality and of yourself. Your beliefs and attitudes are formed by personal experiences and cultural beliefs. Be careful, because these attitudes can be destructive to the development of character.
Who you are is who you need to present to the world. The perception that others have of you stands in the way of you becoming self-conscious; the constant worry of how you appear to society stops you from pursuing your dreams. So much value is placed on the opinions of peers and society that their beliefs form how you begin to view yourself. The prerequisite to success is self-awareness; you must build personal character to reflect true self. It must be an authentic personal identity – not one developed through the lens of others. Developing yourself requires that you become media-conscious and know the difference between reality and entertainment.
Achieving success is a burning desire that’s in everyone (maybe not everyone, but most individuals!). Here you will find three ways to develop into a better person; not only will you achieve societal success, but you will be more content with who you are and what you represent. When you realize that success is not the tool that allows you to be socially accepted – rather, it’s a personal standard that must be determined and obtained by you individually – then you will begin to achieve the success of your dreams.
Be true to yourself!
Take a second right now and ask yourself “Who am I?” Being true to yourself requires that you’re fully aware of who you are. Develop a personal relationship with yourself by allotting a specific amount of time daily to study and self-evaluate. A daily self-evaluation is important because it will allow you to see what’s standing in your way of success.
You probably constantly hear the opinions of everyone one else regarding who you are, what you believe, and what your future looks like. You listen to these people and neglect the fact that your personal opinion should matter the most. A self-study is required of you daily to understand your actions; your daily self-study will reveal the negative behaviors that are keeping you from achieving your personal success.
To get a clear view of yourself, look in the mirror in which you judge others, stare into the standards that you use to condemn. Take off the mask which you wear for society and recognize your flaws, the things in which you’re imperfect. You must identify the things that make you wear the mask in the first place. When you remove the mask that you’re comfortable behind, then and only then you identify who you really are.
A realistic view of yourself is required before you reach any level of success; you must not exaggerate your physical or mental abilities. The urge to be seen as magnificent and fabulous stands in the way of how you really are. You portray false images of self because of your need to be socially accepted. A realistic view will reveal your strengths and weaknesses. Once you know your capabilities, success is straight ahead. If you keep an unrealistic view of yourself, you will be forever lost.
To be true to yourself you need to create personal values and beliefs; these values and beliefs will be reference points for you every time you feel yourself becoming distracted by society and your peers. You’re in a society where everything is changing fast; a trending style today will be forgotten tomorrow. This pace can create individuals who are constantly changing beliefs, ideals and goals. By being true to yourself you will define goals that better your individual future; you will engage in activities that are pleasing to you; and you will live so that you are comfortable with yourself.
Don’t quit; it’s not an option
In a society where you can walk into a gas station, play five numbers and possibly win the lotto, we have become more and more dependent on instant gratification. The ideal of hard work has been replaced with that of overnight success. Success is now the measurement of how we are in relation to everyone around us; we think that success involves competition. Have you noticed now that if you challenge to race someone and they don’t think they’ll win, that instead of living up to the challenge, they’ll refuse to race altogether and makes excuses instead? We have become so distracted on thinking about what place someone finished in the race that we never focus on the race itself.
In elementary school “field day” is a day in which kids are able to showcase physical abilities; it’s a time for families to come cheer and take pride in their children’s athletic abilities. The events usually have eight spots for participants to compete and an equal number of ribbons; anyone who participates receives a ribbon, no matter their athletic prowess or lack of. The distribution of ribbons to all participants was initially to congratulate them for finishing and giving it their best effort. The separation and the ugly stigma of competition resulted because the color of the ribbon (which is in eight different colors) served as the instrument that divided the kids and highlighted their athletic ability, forcing many of them not to participate for fear of not getting the red or the blue. This behavior carries over with us into adulthood because we don’t pursue things we are passionate about, simply because someone else is pursuing the same thing. We have come to view everything as competition, when in actuality the only person we are competing against is ourselves.
We choose to quit when we allow fear to control us. We choose to quit when the journey is longer than expected. But as on a track as well as in life, we will never cross the finish line if we think our race is against another individual, because we will never get on the track.
Develop the leader within you
Right now, you’re influencing someone in your life in many ways you are not aware of. You influence others by your style, by your masculine or feminine physique, with your advanced education credentials. Quite simply, by you getting up and going to work every day, you might influence one of your neighbors who is jobless to seek employment. The fact is, your positive actions inspire other, and your actions might be the catalyst necessary for them to succeed. To be a true leader you must lead by action – not by commanding dictatorship. As a leader, you must provide the standard everyone following you will try to meet or surpass. You must have a clear definition of “leader”; to lead means to have followers. You have the power and ability to lead.
To develop into a leader, you must understand the responsibilities of being placed in the role of leadership. As a leader you will be criticized and held responsible for your actions and the actions of those you are leading. A school teacher will be held responsible for the poor test scores of the students, the CEO of a company will be scrutinized for a poor profit margin. Being the leader means you will be criticized if things go terribly wrong. The flip side is that you will also be rewarded with power and wealth if you improve the lives of the people who are following you.
The challenge to develop into the leader you need to be to achieve success is the fear of failure, the risk of being ridiculed and embarrassed chasing your passion. If the urge to succeed isn’t bigger than the urge to protect your ego, you might choose to follow people down dead end paths – only so that your ego has the comfort of having someone else to blame if failure occurs. To lead, you must have a passion and a goal; without a goal the passion is useless and will get squandered in everything that presents itself. With a goal but without a passion, you will not put forth the effort necessary to accomplish and reach your goals. You must combat the fear of failure, because that feeling keeps many people from trying. Individuals remain stagnant until they see that the road is secure – and the only way to know if the road is secure is to follow someone who’s already been down it.
To be a leader you should be confident in your abilities. Then once you believe in yourself it needs to be accompanied by the desire to succeed. That desire can come from many motives. The desire must exist in order to achieve success. Once you have identified the desire and the thing that motivates you, you must discipline yourself. Discipline is necessary so that you don’t resort back to your old ways of living. Discipline keeps you pursuing your dreams day after day. Being disciplined and repetitive in your actions will bring you success.