When you take care of yourself you can be a better partner.
Remember those speeches on the airlines that instruct you that in case of emergency you should take oxygen for yourself first, and then put the oxygen on your child? The idea is that you can’t be a helpful parent and take care of the child if you don’t have your own oxygen supply. The same logic applies to your romantic relationship. If you aren’t happy and strong, what will you have to offer your partner?
Many of the things we have to do on a daily basis are tiring and keep us so busy that we become stressed. And if we are stressed we might become grumpy, and that’s no good !
Here are some ideas on how to build resilience in yourself from the book “Measure and Manage Stress”:
1. Spend more time doing things that uplift your spirit. (yoga, prayer, walks)
2. Give and receive more affection (hugs are great, but it is often best to ask someone if you may hug them)
3. Play. Have fun doing activities that are purely playful and fun, and are noncompetitive. (juggling,dancing,
kite flying )
4. Laugh. Smile. See the fun in things
5. Read and recite positive affirmations. (don’t just read them…believe them)
Kindler, H.S. & Ginsburg,M. (1994) Measure & manage stress. Menlo Park:Crisp Publications.