Holding tight to the Buddha around my neck I stand in the middle of a four way street.
The direction I should take is unclear to me as I face decisions that I cannot yet take.
Each street has a label such as marriage, culinary school, single life, and writer.
I stand in the middle of this road unable to walk towards one street.
I am afraid to make any decisions because I do not know where the road will lead. I battle with the options my heart runs through as the cars pass me by.
The passengers within these vehicles put their head out the windows and yell at me to make a decisions.
Minutes, hours, days, weeks and even months have passed me by as I find myself still standing in the middle of this intersection.
I don’t want to move. The influence of the traffic overwhelms me as the rain drops begin to fall on my face.
My umbrella has torn apart and I am left with the rain clouds above me. I begin to take a step towards one decision but then I step back as a car cuts me off from the road.
I turn to another street and another car cuts through keeping me from walking on my path.
These cars are the “what if” voices I fight against and they cause me to not be able to take a step toward my future.
I am left scared in the middle of the road still afraid of the future. Where will I go? What will I turn to? I do not want to make the wrong decision. So after years and years of trying to make decisions, I find myself back in this same intersection unsure where to go.