Ah, the enduring journey from boy to man, girl to woman, child to adult. It’s not as simple as it is said. The classification is very blurred, as well. It’s in the definition, not the age. You can find a 16 year old that works, goes to school, has his head on straight, he can be classified as a good man. Yet, a 26 year old that doesn’t work, abuses his wife, and sells/is addicted to some type of subtsance. Is he a man? No, that is a child. An overgrown child that somehow lost his soul somewhere along the way.
In many stages of life, there is a change. Change, be it for better or worse, makes and shapes our character. The changes we encounter, it is the way we respond to them, that will later define our adult lives. Even after the transition, we are still growing, constantly changing. The normal human reaction to change is fear. Fear ultimately brings about sadness, sorrow, anger, the ultimate negatives in our lives. As a child, we don’t understand these emotions, or even why we feel them. Yet, as we grow, we should come to understand them to better cope. However, in our lifetime, the average “adult” can be more classified as a child, because of the inability to deal with said negative emotions.
In years past, the world was simpler, less evolved, yet more stable and understanding of what it is to work hard and, pardon my language, grow the fuck up. I’d say that I’m still a young man, only recently turned 21 and coping with heartbreaks and the new found ability to buy alcohol. It’s a struggle to not allow a substance to control my life. Why is it such a struggle? Perhaps I yearn to be numb from the pressures of life and the pressures that the opposite sex has on me. I, like many, took myself into this hole and cannot blame a single entity but myself. I’m an adult, I made every decision that brought me to where I am. Mistakes? Maybe. Regrets? Not entirely. If I were to regret my major decisions that shaped my character and had I not gone through the hells that made me, I wouldn’t be me. It’s the truth, that you have to walk through hell before reaching heaven.
An adult is all about being responsible and accepting your mistakes, rather than denying them. Accept the mistake, move on, but don’t forget it. If you forget the act of a mistake, you will return to it again. So, you will return in a circle, never learning or growing from it until you break that circle. We often return to mistakes, however. Why? Because it’s what we know. Like, my habit of drinking alcohol when I am pressured, hurt, or disappointed. It’s that circle that I have identified and that I must break. The simple saying, “ain’t nothing to it but to do it” rings true here. It’s really not always that simple, though. The difference between an adult and a child in this manner. The child behavior would continually return to the habit, without understanding that it’s probably only making things worse. The adult would acknowledge the habit as unnecessary baggage and begin the painful process of cutting it out of his or her life. The struggle of an adult, is to grow from experiences, not to let themselves be beat further into the ground. The child, not knowing better, will always return, until the realization kicks in or is shown to them from an outside source.
I believe that there are way too many overgrown children in this world that we now live in and I’m struggling to not be part of that number. I further believe that we need someone to save us before it’s all too late. As the way our children will grow up, very few of them will come to find themselves as adults. Only because many of their parents did not understand what it was to be an adult. However, for the people that try and continue to grow, I’m glad that the company of my close friends are among those people. I’d hate to see how my life would have turned out, had my friends not been there to keep me away from the influences of my home life as a child. In a way, I also have to believe it’s the company you keep, that defines your stance as an adult or a child. If you have to grow up and your friends will not, you just gotta leave them behind until they do. So, also part of that circle of mistakes I spoke about. If you return to them and whatever it is they do that keeps you and them from maturing, you will never grow up and never find true fulfillment in your life.