Glee deviated from its typical formula regarding celebrity episodes (like Madonna and Lady Gaga) in two significant ways tonight: One, the pop star they were celebrating actually appeared on the show. Two, instead of roaming the halls, the auditorium, the glee club room or their bedrooms singing, the cast sang the Brittany songs as part of a dreamlike sequence that perfectly imitated the original Spears videos (down to the last shot). In this way, the kids were able to really show their stuff: costumes, dancing, back up dancers, snakes, the whole nine yards and it was incredible!
Here come the spoilers:
Will has a great idea for the kids’ weekly assignment: to feature adult contemporary music, in particular Christopher Cross (you know: “The Moon and New York City” and “Sailing” guy…). Bor-ing! Of course, the crew is none too pleased with his choice.
Kurt suggests they do Britney Spears instead. He notes that there is even a Facebook campaign mounting (of five people) for them to sing a Britney song at the upcoming Homecoming Assembly.
Will shoots him down immediately. He feels Britney Spears is not a good role model for high school kids. Brittany (cheerleader Brittany) supports that because she has led her life in Ms. Spears’ shadow. You see, she is Brittany Spears, well Brittany S. Peirce, but you get the idea…
Emma feels that Will is being too uptight about the Spears thing. Will can’t believe he’s being called uptight by someone who “buys hand sanitizer by the gallon.” Emma explains that her new boyfriend, Dr. Carl Howell D.D.S., has helped her loosen up a bit. She can even mix two different types of grapes together now!
Faster than you can say “Uncle Jesse”, John Stamos appears around the corner. Turns out he’s the hunky dentist who stole Emma’s heart and wants to take her to lunch. He and Will meet. Carl asks Will if he grinds his teeth. Dr. Howell moans about the state of teenagers’ teeth these days and that he wants to hold a dental hygiene seminar, but the school is dragging its feet. Will invites him to come speak to the Glee Club.
Meanwhile in the hallway, the two generic football bullies, Dave and Azimio, steal Finn’s letter jacket and tear it in half. Finn is ready to throw down, but Artie steps in and the jocks relent. Only because it’s against their code to hit someone in a wheelchair. Coach Beiste watches the incident from afar.
Dr. Carl comes in to teach everyone about oral hygiene. Santana hits on him. He passes out blue tablets for everyone to chew to see how well they brush their teeth. Rachel, Artie and Brittany have horrible plaque issues. Artie says it hard for him to brush because he can’t see the mirror. Brittany says she thought drinking soda was like brushing your teeth. She thought Dr. Pepper was a dentist.
Brittany goes to see Carl to get her teeth fixed. He gives her an anesthetic and she’s in la-la land. Guess what? It’s Britney Time! Cut to: our Brittany as Spears. She reenacts the “I’m a Slave (For You)” video shot for shot and is amazing. We get to see another side her in the video and she’s good.
Brittany wakes up finds out she has 68 cavities and has to come back the next day.
Finn is in the hallway talking to Rachel about how he’s bummed that he’s not the quarterback anymore and that he’s not cool now. Rachel thinks it’s just fine, so they can be on more equal footing. Finn can’t believe she wants him to be unhappy. She wants to be the only thing that can make him happy. She’s “just being honest.”
Santana and Britney walk by. Santana says that Rachel dresses like To Catch a Predator jail bait. Finn laughs and agrees. He says he’s “just being honest” too.
Santana goes to see Dr. Howell, even though her mouth is perfect, because she’s hot for him. She joins Brittany for her appointment and they want to “get their anesthesia on.”
In their drug induced state, Brittany and Santana do the Spears and Madonna video “Me Against the Music” with the real Britney Spears showing up at the end.
Just want to say that I’m so happy they are featuring these two more. They have been under the radar fan faves since last season and it’s good to see them shine.
Back at the Glee Club meeting, Will keeps pushing his lame Christopher Cross agenda. Brittany demands every solo from now on. Her fantasy has proved to her that she is more talented than all of them. Kurt fights for Britney Spears despite Will’s reservations. Will denies him again. Kurt goes off on Will for “being so friggin’ uptight all of the time” and is sent to Mr. Figgins’ office.
Will goes to see Carl for his teeth grinding problem. Carl suggests they talk it out about the Emma situation. He asks Will to back off and Will agrees. Carl gives Will some candy and tells him to live a little, no wonder Will and Emma didn’t work out. They are both so uptight. Carl says Emma likes him because he’s impulsive.
Rachel goes to see Carl and is reading a Britney Spears biography while in the waiting room. Well, we already know that this office is a haven for Spears fantasies, so here we go. Rachel dreams she’s Britney in the “Hit Me Baby, One More Time” video.
The next day at school, Rachel shows up dressed like she’s still in the video. The guys in the hallway love it, Finn does not. Finn wants to give her his jacket to cover up. She says she thought this was what he wanted and that they shouldn’t control each other. He should try to get back on the football team, if that’s what he really wants and she’ll keep dressing slutty.
Jordan offers Finn anything in the world if Finn will give him Rachel.
Will buys a new flashy car (the same as Carl’s) and shows it to Emma to impress her. She’s not. Then he plays her a great Christopher Cross jam and she’s further unimpressed. He’s going to take her for a ride and then…
Terri shows up in front of his car, demanding that he take it back. Emma takes off. Terri tells Will that she knows they will get back together and she doesn’t want him to be broke. He is mad and thinks she’s crazy.
Inside the school, Santana digs Rachel’s new look. Kurt says she owes it all to Britney Spears. Rachel agrees and says that Spears helped her come out of her shell and like herself more. Just when Will is starting to reconsider the whole Britney ban…
Sue walks in. She has to talk to Will. The night before she was in the library and found Jordon being Master of his Domain while watching a video of Rachel dressed as Britney Spears. She made Jordan sit in her office, naked, and explain himself. She warns Will that no good can come from Britney Spears’ music and she has the sweaty butt stains on her office chair to prove it. Will gets a look in his eye and she warns him not to perform any B.S. song at the Halloween Assembly.
Britney Spears is in the hallway in a Cheerio uniform talking to Brittany and Tina. Artie wheels up. Spears tells Tina she was stupid to dump Artie. Tina agrees, but Artie’s over it. He joins the football team, in uniform, and they perform “Stronger” on the field.
Artie wakes up from the anesthesia.
Artie talks to Finn about really trying to get him on the football team. Finn just doesn’t see how that is possible. Coach Beiste walks in and Finn denies being part of any plot to get Artie on the team again(like last week). Beiste says that’s a shame because it’s a great idea and she needs Finn to help Artie suit up. They’re both on the team! They’re going to use him as a battering ram.
Rachel’s not too happy that Finn’s back on the team. Santana says he looks hotter now. Will tells the class that he’s down to do a Britney Spears song for Homecoming (yay) and that he is going to join them (boo).
In the locker room, Rachel is back in her old clothes. Despite Finn’s assurances, she’s worried he’ll stray if he’s the cool quarterback again. She wants him to choose between football and her.
At the Homecoming Assembly: Will tells Emma he’s loosening up and even going to perform. Emma looks worried. Becky tells Sue that she hears the Glee Club is performing Britney Spears. Sue puts Becky on Red Alert and can do a citizen’s arrest if necessary.
New Directions performs “Toxic”. The crowd isn’t so jazzed at first, but then starts to get into it. Jordon is foaming at the mouth and yelling. Then the crown starts to go wild. Emma’s not loving it. Sue’s head is about to explode. Jordon gets punched in the face for grabbing a guy’s butt in his frenzy. Sue pulls the fire alarm to stop the all-out Britney Spears Sex Riot. The kids go crazy and run everywhere.
The next day, Sue shows up wearing a neck brace, a sign of her injury during the Sex Riot. She has hired Gloria Allred and is suing Will down to his last sweater vest.
Will apologizes to Emma for the Homecoming Sex Riot. He was just doing what he thought she wanted him to do. She just wants him to be himself, just a little more relaxed. He returns his new car.
At the lockers, Quinn hits on Finn. They are both back on top again and it would be perfect. He turns her down. Turns out, she is Rachel’s spy and tells Rachel “Congrats. Looks like he really loves you.”
Rachel wants to sing in class. Will says no more Spears after yesterday’s drama. She wants to stick to Adult Contemporary, just more contemporary. Rachel dedicates the song to Finn. She has realized that she can’t control him and that she was chocking him like a little bird.
“He can fly?” asks Brittany. She also wonders why Rachel is singing at all when she was supposed to be getting all of the solos from now on.
Rachel sings “The Only Exception” by Paramore and cries. Then Puck gives Quinn a look. Then Will looks sad. Then Finn cries. Will ends up in his old car, alone and sad.
Next Week: Finn makes a Grilled Cheesus (a sandwich that looks like Jesus) and the crew finds religion. Get your hankies ready looks like Kurt’s dad is in the hospital.