As each of us begins to mature both physically and mentally we tend to learn to view life from a different vantage point, and among these the prospect of dating changes after 40 as well. When we were (or are) young dating is an activity that is largely approached as a quest in search of some elusive component that is missing from our individual personality or existence. Whether we are conscious of it or not in our early years there always seems to be some goal that is expected to be achieved from dating. In truth, the dating experiences associated with youth often to seem in retrospect to be little more than engaging in a ritual that is yet another necessary step on our individual road to maturity. The learning process is fraught with suspense, drama and expectations that are rarely worth the effort.
Dating changes drastically after the age of 40 in that we have a vast volume of life experiences and relationships to look back upon for guidance when interacting with a new dating partner. The common mistakes we each make in dating that were present in our youth are largely gone, replaced with a “been there, done that” mentality that works well when avoiding people and circumstances that feel and seem incorrect. Age allows an individual to hopefully become a better judge of character without being judgmental, and discovering people of quality becomes a much simpler task than when we were young. While most people view being set in your ways as being a rigid and stubborn way to live, when it comes to dating after the age of 40 knowing who we are and what we like is a good thing.
One of the most important changes in dating after 40 is that we tend to view the dating process from a more cerebral position than younger folks. Physicality becomes less critical, replaced by a more prominent desire to bond with another person emotionally and intellectually. The narcissistic ways of our youth take a backseat to our new found ability to share openly and place the needs and desires of another person before our own. When these traits are not present in a dating partner after the age of 40, we possess the tools and ability to extricate ourselves from a given dating circumstance without drama and in a civil manner that is less painful for all concerned.