Every relationship involves hard work and trust is the main element that needs to be established. But what happens if you have a hard time trusting your partner?
A lot of people tell me that they trusted their partners in the past only to get cheated on or deceived. Having a similar experience of my own in the past, I have to admit that it has been really hard to trust men again. But the good news is that I am learning to solve my trust issues in my current relationship, which is probably the healthiest relationship I have had in my life thus far. Every day is a new start, so if you have trust issues in your relationship, try to practice these four things in order to have a healthy relationship.
Letting Go Of Negative Past Relationships
Probably the hardest thing to do in life is letting go of the negative past relationships that ended badly due to cheating, lying, and betrayal. But what’s done is done and it is very important to forget the past and learn from your mistakes. Everyone has been hurt in their lives from an ex-partner, but it does not mean that your current partner should have to pay for your trust issues. Comparing your past relationships to your current relationship is a big mistake that a lot of us do when we need to justify our trust issues. Does this sound familiar? “I trusted my partner and he/she ended up cheating on me, I don’t want this to happen again, that’s why it is so hard to trust you.” The only way to move forward in your relationship is erase negative thoughts and focus on what IS happening in your relationship.
Listening and Learning
We all know how to talk, but how many of us really listen to our partner? When trying to understand why your partner has trust issues listen carefully to what they are saying and try to be patient. Most people in relationships want to learn to trust again, so talking about why they don’t trust is important. When you listen, you have a better understanding and can help your partner learn to trust you. Most people who have trust issues just want to be understood and are willing to trust again. If you are the one struggling with trust issues, listen to how it makes your partner feel that you don’t trust him/her, it might give you some insight about learning to let go and moving forward with trust.
Time Heals Everything
In relationships we all want quick fixes to our problems. We think things will change in a few days, but the truth is, trust builds over time. I have had serious problems in my life related to work, family, relationships, and insecurities, but after living in Europe these issues were solved over time. Now I can say that a lot of these issues I had were all solved because of time. When you give yourself time to grow with your partner, trust will naturally come and your relationship will become healthy.
When you communicate openly about your trust issues you become honest about who you are. If you want to change and start trusting your partner, talking about it will make you feel better. It is normal to feel alone when you don’t trust anyone, so when you practice open communication with your partner each and every time, you will not feel so afraid to talk about your trust issues. When your partner encourages open communication you will feel that your trust issues are disappearing as you will have the support and understanding from your partner.