Cookie (Heather Joy Budner), Jasmine (April Billingsley), Kristy (Elizabeth Mullins) and Jimbo (Justin Capaz) are all on their way to some cheerleading nationals (cuz they’re all cheerleaders, duh!) when Jimbo accidentally slams the car into an electrical pole while getting his electrical pole serviced by Cookie. The group decides to explore the area and see if they can find help when they happen upon a small, seemingly abandoned, farmhouse. Nobody seems to question the “fresh” chili Kristy finds in the fridge but then…who does??!
After some semi-nekkid exercising, Jimbo is elected to head back to the car and wait for help to arrive. Kristy opts to go with Jimbo and they’re off; leaving Cookie and Jasmine all by their lonesome. Whatever shall they do? I KNOW! I KNOW! Sunbathing, masturbation, voyeurism and lesbian lovin’ involving chili? YOU ARE CORRECT SIR!!
Oopsy daisy! It would appear “dangerous” escaped convicts, Hoss (Maury Sterling) & Tober (Alan Fessenden), have stumbled upon the cheerleaders steamy boots knockin’ and they’re looking for hostages!
Meanwhile, Jimbo mistakenly loses the overweight Kristy while coaxing his penis into a warrior stance! Kristy has been taken by the evil Andre (Ron Jeremy)! Luckily Deputy Hollingsworth (Faye Canada) shows up to save Jimbo just in time when Andre returns for him!
This here movie is prime cut comedy! Andre has made a deal with the Devil to deliver sinner’s souls to Hell. What’s left over goes in Andre’s meat grinder! Holy Hell…chili my ass!!
Oh man…great stuff. Don’t get me wrong, the acting wasn’t exactly Oscar winning but not every low budget b-horror has to in order to be fun. I especially enjoyed the old potty mouth narrator and his enema nurse. I’m telling you, I’m still giggling over Andre leading Kristy to her doom by dangling a donut from a tree!!
The director, Philip Cruz, knew what he was working with and did his best to make it happen and in my opinion it definitely came together well. This film had gore, stunt tits, foul language including the hilarious use of the word “fag Newton” and a cheerleader rumble that could only have been inspired by somebody familiar with exploitation. I challenge you not to smile when Jasmine decides enough is enough and catches a flying butcher knife out of the air and proceeds to pound Andre like a Jean Claude Van Damme film extra. Her fists of fury and feet of defeat will have you quivering in your recliner!
This was a neat little film. Wait…that wasn’t blurb worthy…how about, “Andre The Butcher revels in a wicked sense of humor and buckets of gore. Hilarious from beginning to end!” Now that’s blurb-a-rific!! Treat yourself to a sixer and Andre The Butcher and for God’s sake…would somebody please put that damn guy out of his misery!! (in-joke folks! Watch the movie!)