It was my junior year of high school and graduation couldn’t come any sooner. I only had a few friends in high school. One of my friends told me that she was pregnant. Her boyfriend asked her if she was going to have an abortion. When she started talking about him, I found out that I knew him and he was trying to date other girls. I knew my friend wasn’t ready to have this baby and rely on a man who wasn’t ready to be a father. She was in an interracial relationship that her parents didn’t know about and wouldn’t approve of. My friend had a lot to deal with. After being pregnant for several months, my friend decided to have an abortion. I didn’t approve of her having an abortion, nor did I think she was right for making that decision. However, I wasn’t living in her shoes and I didn’t know what was best for her. I’m pretty for sure that it will stay in her mind forever that she killed an unborn child.
A year later, I started dating this guy who had a child from a previous relationship. A red light flashed inside my head and said, “Don’t date him” but it suddenly followed by a green light. Before I knew it, we were seeing each other every other day. Everything seemed great at the beginning until I found myself more into him, and less into focusing on accomplishing my future goals. Before I could break up with him, I found out that I was pregnant. When I told him the news, he asked me the dumbest question. Although I can’t remember his exact words, it was something stupid that most scared men would ask. I felt betrayed because I was lied to. In the beginning of our relationship, my boyfriend told me that he didn’t want to have any more kids. My life changed drastically after becoming pregnant. I can remember wanting to have an abortion even though I knew it meant killing an unborn baby. Even in high school, there were already a few girls that had an abortion. I didn’t see a big problem because I knew I wasn’t ready to take care of a child. My mother wanted to kick me out if I had an abortion. I wouldn’t have been able to live with myself if I had an abortion. Memories of my friend played into my head about the conversation of her having an abortion.
Feeling alone and confused, I did what was right. I did not have an abortion because destroying something I helped create was ungodly like. Having this baby was beyond all the issues I was facing. My daughter was like a mini me. If I could relive my life again, I wouldn’t be a teenager having sex. Instead, I would be learning about the world and participating in fun activities. There are programs within the state that helps ease the financial stress. Children are wonderful human beings who need love. It is definitely a challenge in taking care of a child. One advice I would give to teen parents is that children need guidance and a positive role model.