You are reading this because you wish to learn how to improve yourself in a more efficient way. Self improvement is something that should be desired by everyone on this globe… however, to often, we find that people are too complacent with themselves. They find it easier to roam about their misguided lives, never improving or learning. Hopefully, what I have learned, and about to share with you, will help to make you a better person.
1:Review Your Day
One of the most overlooked, but most useful, tool in improving yourself is to review your day. This means that, before you retire to bed, you should look over the things that you feel could have went better. Then you should look deeper and find what you could have done better to fix these errors. Maybe you shouldn’t have sent that email to your boss so quickly without reviewing it. For example: Jim, our imaginary mistake maker, was at work today. Naturally, Jim is rushing to finish an email to his boss, whose name shall be Richard, so that he can get to lunch and fill his stomach which has been grumbling in a low pitch at him all morning. Now, Richard, who is just getting to work, reads this less than charming email you sent him about a raise. He immediately is pissed off because, in your email you sent him, you repeatedly called him Dick…. no one calls this Richard Dick. He denies your otherwise well written email and you have a bills that are requiring more money than what your earning. Now, if Jim looks back at his day in a creative and analytical way, then he will never make that mistake again. Hopefully next time he takes his time and writes the email WHILE thinking about what he is typing.
Reviewing your day can also be useful in other ways. Maybe you want to look at what you did right so that you can repeat them. Too often do we overlook the things that went well, and we fail to ask ourselves what we did to make it work. Also, it can add to your self-esteem and improve your attitude, therefore creating positive results in the future.
2: Asking others what their view of yourself is
Often, we see ourselves as what we want to be or what we wish we were. I know that I do not like to see what I do wrong… so, ask someone else for their honest and truthful opinion. Ask them things such as “What do I do that irritates you?” “What can I do to improve myself” “If there was one thing you could change about me, what would it be?”. But remember, ask a multitude of critiques… nothing is worse than someone making you worse than what you started out to be…. Let’s look at another imaginary friend, Bill. Now Bill is a husband, a parent, and a teacher for a High School English class. Let’s break down an average day of his life:
His View: I woke up, and went downstairs where my wife had made some breakfast and I ate it quickly. You see, I was running late for school because she had to talk about how she slept so poorly last night…. even though I continued to assure her that i’d make up for my constant snoring that night with dinner. When I got to my class, they were a loud and obnoxious class like usual…. I felt that I was very generous in not assigning them punishment work, but they didn’t seem to understand how nice I was being… even after I asked them politely to be quiet and study for an upcoming test. This happened in every class today…. the classes would be loud, I would scold them nicely, and they would continue to be loud. So when I got home after a long day of work, I wasn’t in the best of moods. I asked the kids and my wife how their days were, and I got the same responses… “Fine”. I had promised the misses that we would go out to eat that night, but the papers that I had to grade got in the way and I had promised her a dinner some other night.
Everyone else’s view: “Bill woke up. Came downstairs and was in his average grumpy mood…. last night I slept horribly due to his loud snoring. He promised me that he would make it up with a trip our to eat that night. He didn’t even bother to thank me for the breakfast that took me half an hour to prepare and didn’t even reallly talk to me. That night, Bill was in an even worse mood! I tried to talk about my day… but he wouldn’t listen to me…. I tried to ask him about his day, but he just grunted and left to go to the living room and watch tv. That night, he decided to cancel our date, because he ‘had to much work to do’… even though he promised me and had plenty of time earlier to get some done. ” -The Wife
“When he got to school, Mr. Bill was in a horrific mood. He was yelling and swearing he would assign us more homework if we didn’t be quiet. The sad part though, was that we didn’t even talk. If someone even raised their hand, Mr. Bill would come at them, verbally assaulting them. If only he had a little more tolerance… we are a high school class, after all.” – Students of the hypothetical school
“Dad came home and was in the grumpiest of moods… he immediately came unleashed upon us in the living room. Apparently we had to tell him about our ENTIRE day… not just the important parts. So we received a good thirty minute yelling for that.” -Kids
As you can see, there are many different viewpoints beside yours when it comes to how you can act. Try asking someone that you aren’t really close friends with about what they think about you. See what they say, and improve.
3:If you do not like what you see, analyze what and why you do not like it, and then analyze your own behavior to find out whether you behave in the same way. Be honest and impartial in your analysis.
This is self explanatory…. it helps if you know what you do and do not like about yourself. If you discover that you manifest some of these undesirable traits of character and behavior, affirm to yourself often, that every time you manifest these traits or behavior, you are going to be conscious and aware of them, and do your best to avoid them. Also, it is a good idea to ask others what they think about that certain trait… maybe it isn’t as bad as you thought it was.
Do not be disappointed or frustrated if you do not attain fast results. It does not matter how many times you fail or forget to behave as you desired. Persevere with your efforts and never give up, and you will begin to see how you and your life change. You should never take self improvement too far… once people call you a robot, then I think you are taking perfection to far. Life should have a little fun…. don’t strive too much for perfection, because you will be disappointed in the outcome.