Today I was reading a great article that a friend shot over to me and it made me remember something I told my daughter many years ago.
I was trying to help my then teenage girl understand that feminism is not a noble or aspiring thing to be because it really isn’t about woman’s “right’s” at all. In fact the whole concept of feminism is much like trying to paint a zebra one color or put a monkey in a business suit. It can be done to change that animal but why? And what is the purpose of trying to make a being something they are not?
The answer lies in an area that makes a lot of people uncomfortable. We need to remember that God made us and he made us a particular way. This isn’t a very easy sell in this world of feminism. In fact I suspect I’ve ticked off quite a few already by making a comment that a “male” being is responsible for making me what I am; a woman.
Or that the idea that I have to conform to a set of rules or regulations made by God is the only acceptable way.
But here’s the deal. Man is an image of God. He made us this way on purpose and in His perfect wisdom made us very different from each other. I know it’s not a popular thought that we should follow these “rules” that some would say are archaic and outdated but the fact remains that this is the plan.
Now having made that comment let’s elaborate a little on this idea. God does not wish that I am to walk around in stiletto heals; with a crisp white apron around my fashionably small waist; making a gourmet dinner for “my man”. Actually I am a pretty great cook but I don’t do it because God or my husband told me to. God gave me the talent and the grandmother that was the best teacher ever. THAT is why I cook….that and the love of great tasting food.
But the idea that I am to be a sex machine; a keeper of the house, a “head cook and bottle washer” is preposterous. Anyone that’s been to my house lately is sure to laugh at the idea I’m doing THAT very well at all.
I don’t think there is one passage in the bible that says I need to keep a sparkling house; to be a model for all women everywhere. It does say that I am to be a part of God’s plan to be a woman. A woman.
So what is it to be a woman anyway? Is it to be the career person or the housewife? To be the entrepreneur or the mommy? Is it to be the doctor, lawyer or the house cleaner? It’s ALL those things and none of those things. We should be who WE should be. Not some idea of feminism; not some idea of a biblical woman. We should use the god given brain cells that He intended for us to use to become the best damn person we can be. With the knowledge that we are individuals; that we are all different; we can achieve what we wish with our lives.
I have seen lately the struggles of the modern woman. From my daughter trying to make a living in Arizona to my niece trying to make a niche in the business world; I feel for the upcoming generation of women.
They have it so much more tough than I did growing up. I see that they are expected to have all the goods. The whole package. We women of today are expected to not only do the “Suzy Homemaker” thing but also take the business world by storm. We are expected to be not only the bread winners but the person that takes the kids to school, fix supper and mow the lawn.
I told a friend one time that I used to think of myself as a liberal woman; a person that wanted to change the world by doing good works. I fell for the whole Gloria Steiniem, Jane Fonda crap a long time ago. They told me that I could “have it all”. By that they meant I could have the house, the husband, the kids and the career.
What they really meant is that I could DO it all. The housecleaning, the sex kitten thing, the mommy thing and still work a 40 hour week!!
I don’t have an issue with women working. In fact I do have a part time job as an herbalist. I’ve been a cook, caterer, janitor, sales person, wedding designer and many other jobs over the years. They have afforded me some great things like food and clothing in my life. They have paid the electric bill, helped with vacations and gotten me out of the house.
But I didn’t do these jobs because some feminist told me it was my “right”. I did it to feed my family; to pay the bills. To try something new. And the very idea that I would take on these extra chores as being a “right” is ludicrous to me. I cannot imagine some woman ever saying to herself “Gee I have a couple of hours that aren’t filled with my kids, my husband and my life; lets fill it up with a job!”. Good grief.
So where does that leave the woman of today? Do we become the next Einstein or the next Martha Stuart? Do we listen to the media’s idea that we need to wear a push up bra and talk like a slut or do we make homemade dresses and never wear makeup or cut our hair again?
We do what we want to do. We do the best job we can. This world is tough enough for us humans without putting people in a pigeon hole. Being an individual is just that. Being unique in our own way. Finding our own niche in life takes a lot of work; a lot of chutzpa and to do it well we need to be true to ourselves.
If there is one thing I would tell the women of today and the women of tomorrow. Do not let the liberal world kowtow you into thinking you need to be anything but what you damn well please. If it’s being a nuclear physicist then fine. If it’s being a stay at home mommy with 8 kids that’s fine.
Be yourself! Be the best you; you and God want you to be! Just be true to yourself and don’t let anyone push you around.