Television is alive with thousands of advertisements for thousands of products that claim they are the next “big thing,” or the product you need to make your life easier. Even the infomercials that come on at four in the morning have to sell a technology pr product that makes your life easier, otherwise why would the manufacturer pay millions for the half hour- or hour-long TV spot?
Even the number of the latest in “wrinkle reducing” or “fountain of youth-esque” potions, lotions and cures that claim technological superiority have climbed over the years, with rollers for this and smoothers for that and ingredients that promise to pull the skin taught, but at least they don’t sell “Snake Oil,” yet, right?
The Noodle Cooler?
Of course, you simply blow on them, right? Well, not with this noodle cooler, not unless your mouth has a propeller and a spot for batteries, that is. This is one of those inconvenient tech gadgets that looks and sounds cooler than it is. It is supposed to be a simple, small fan that attaches to your arm and cools your noodles, or other food before eating. However, the way it attached, it is made to sue with chopsticks. That means noodle cooler users have to learn to sue chopsticks first-definitely inconvenient. Try to imagine sitting down to dinner, at home alone hopefully, and attaching a fan to your arm so that every chopstick load of noodles is cooled before eating. Wouldn’t it be easier just to blow on the noodles or wait for them to cool?
Novophone “Retro Cellphone Handset”($34.95)
This is just dumb. I can see using it as a novelty item, but as a convenient way to talk on the phone? I don’t think so. The entire point of having a cell phone is so people do not have to be wired or plugged in anymore. To take a cell phone and plug a headset into it is well, redundant, not to mention inconvenient as it completely defeats the purpose and gives the user and extra piece to lose, too. Would you be caught dead using this such a thing in public?
OK, a video cassette rewinder is the perfect and convenient product for people who always forget to rewind their tapes before bringing them back to Blockbuster. However, Blockbuster has gone out of business and the DVD rewinder is not only inconvenient but completely useless. DVDs do not rewind, although the catch phrase for the product is “You’ll never forget to rewind your DVDs again.” useless, I tell you. Even more inconvenient would have been the money wasted on a truly an inconvenient tech gadget, however, the company does not sell them anymore. Enough said.
I do most of the housework and when I saw the “Clean-up Slippers” I did a double-take. This is a pair of slippers with a tiny dust brush on one slipper and a tiny dustpan on the other. The wearer is supposed to use one foot to sweep a tiny dirt pile into the other foot fitted with a dustpan. Then what? While it is a cute idea, can you imagine the dexterity needed to get it into the trash can?
Warm Air Dish Drier($79.99)
This one is less inconvenience than unnecessary expense and effort. The “Warm Air Dish Drier” is a large plastic device that sits on your counter into which you place your washed dishes, on goes the plastic lid and you turn it on and it dries your dishes. Think of it as a combination hair dryer and an ordinary dish drainer. At over $100 and the cost of electricity, this may top them all. Can’t you simply place your dishes on the drainer and let nature take its course? No, of course not, you should have an inconvenient little tech gadget for that.
Well, as always, if something seems like it is simply too good to be true, it must be. And for most of these technological products this is a true statement. While some of the new little gadgets and products are worth the “just $19.95 and we’ll double your order” tag line, other convenient products make life harder instead-or a bit more ridiculous, anyway.
“Home of the Fastest DVD Rewinder,” DVD Rewinder
“Clean-Up Slippers, CHINDOGU
“Novophone Retro Headsets” Novophone
“Warm-Air 3-2/5-Liter-Capacity Dish Dryer,” Amazon
“The Noodle Cooler Fan,” Supladita